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The best “Bachelor in Paradise” captions you didn't see

The best “Bachelor in Paradise” captions you didn't see

One of the best things about 'Paradise' this season were the cheeky captions producers used to troll the contestants. EW has a look at the best on-screen chyrons fans didn't see.

Never mind the romance, drama, love triangles, and ridiculous dates — the most entertaining thing about Bachelor in Paradise this season were the captions. Whether trolling Aven for busting a move (badly) in episode 8 ("Elaine Benes School of Dance") or poking fun at Kat for yelling in her confessionals ("Max Volume"), the folks dreaming up these chyrons were truly doing stellar work.

Since producers weren't able to use all of the cheeky captions they brainstormed, we asked the Bachelor in Paradise team to share some of the gems viewers didn't see. Good comedy should never go to waste.

Sean, 26

<p>ABC</p> Sean on 'Bachelor in Paradise'

ABC

Sean on 'Bachelor in Paradise'

Summary of his Paradise "journey": The software sales rep arrived on the beach in episode 1, and soon hit it off with former Bachelorette Rachel Recchia. When she ditched him for Brayden, Sean tried hitting on Jess and later Sam P., before being sent home in epsiode 5.

Best Unused Chyrons:

  • AI Generated

  • Doesn’t Know When He’s Been Rejected

  • Can’t Read The Room

Mercedes, 25

<p>ABC</p> Mercedes on 'Bachelor in Paradise'

ABC

Mercedes on 'Bachelor in Paradise'

Summary of her Paradise "journey": She explored a "connection" with Will, but ultimately moved on to Tyler. Once the Paradise Truth Box revealed that the Tyler wasn't that "into" her, she sent him packing in episode 9 and gave her rose to Jordan the race car driver. But Mercedes wasn't feeling him, so she left the beach alone.


Best Unused Chyron:

  • Can Do Better

Sam J., 27

<p>ABC</p> Sam J. on 'Bachelor in Paradise'

ABC

Sam J. on 'Bachelor in Paradise'

Summary of her Paradise "journey": This mild-mannered occupational therapist from Ohio had a nice thing going with Aaron S., but she had to leave the beach in episode 4 due to a crippling case of constipation.

Best Unused Chyrons:

  • Constipated

  • Constipated 9 Days

  • Can’t Poop

  • Has A Poop Baby

Sam P., 34

<p>ABC</p> Sam P. on 'Bachelor in Paradise'

ABC

Sam P. on 'Bachelor in Paradise'

Summary of her Paradise "journey": An import from Bachelor in Paradise Canada, this lively beauty salon owner arrived after Sam J. left. She struck up a chill situationship with Peter, but later admitted she didn't see a future with him.

Best Unused Chyron:

  • Not Constipated

Aven, 29

<p>ABC</p> Aven on 'Bachelor in Paradise'

ABC

Aven on 'Bachelor in Paradise'


Summary of his Paradise "journey": Aven and Kylee began dating in episode 2 and stayed together the rest of the season. They chose not to get engaged in the finale but left the beach together. The relative stability of their relationship led some viewers to label Aven as "boring," which he did not like at all. But based on these unused captions, perhaps those viewers weren't alone in their assessment?

Best Unused Captions:

  • Life of the Party

  • Mr. Excitement

  • Likes To Take Naps

  • Can’t Have a Conversation Sitting Up

Will, 30

<p>ABC</p> Will on 'Bachelor in Paradise'

ABC

Will on 'Bachelor in Paradise'

Summary of his Paradise "journey": Pure pain. He hit it off with Kylee only to have Aven steal her away. Then he hit it off with Mercedes, only to have Tyler steal her away. The academic interventionist was put out of his misery and sent home in episode 5.

Best Unused Chyron:

  • Big Mope Energy

Davia, 26

<p>ABC</p> Davia on 'Bachelor in Paradise'

ABC

Davia on 'Bachelor in Paradise'

Summary of her Paradise "journey": Davia, a marketing manager from South Carolina, arrived in episode 5 just in time to ruin Kat's birthday. Though she and Tanner had a good date, their flame burned out quickly and she went home two episodes later.

Best Unused Chyrons:

  • Doesn’t Care That It’s Kat’s Birthday

  • Rocking Incredible Self-Tanner

Blake, 32

<p>ABC</p> Blake on 'Bachelor in Paradise'

ABC

Blake on 'Bachelor in Paradise'

Summary of his Paradise "journey": Oh my God, this guy. He failed to get engaged to Tayshia on season 16 of The Bachelorette, so he decided to crash Katie Thurston's season the following year in episode 4. He and Katie got engaged; it did not last. Blake came to Paradise because he was suffering withdrawal symptoms from not being on TV for a couple years. He began dating Jess, but when Katie dropped by the beach in episode 8 to cause trouble (and host a Paradise roast), Blake decided things weren't working out with Jess and left in episode 9.

Best Unused Chyrons:

  • Third Time’s a Charm

  • Questioning His Life Choices

Jess, 24

<p>ABC</p> Jess on 'Bachelor in Paradise'

ABC

Jess on 'Bachelor in Paradise'

Summary of her Paradise "journey": The youngest Paradisian (nicknamed "Baby Jess") spent most of her time on the beach with Blake, though she did kiss Tyler once, and ended up sticking around after Blake left to "explore" things with Tanner. She let him down gently and left the beach alone in the finale.

Best Unused Chyrons:

  • Baby Jess

  • Still Hasn’t Even Had A 1x1

  • Currently in a Situationship

Wells, 38

<p>ABC</p> Wells on 'Bachelor in Paradise'

ABC

Wells on 'Bachelor in Paradise'

Summary of his Paradise "journey": He made drinks. He let weepy singles tell him their troubles. He fixed the Paradise Truth Box when it was broken.

Best Unused Chyrons:

  • Thinking Of Something Else Right Now

  • Taurus with Rising Sagittarius Moon

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