I love my wife.
I know that I love my wife, and she knows that I love her. We've never had any issues that have pushed us to the brink of divorce, but when I think about our relationship, I realize that there is always room for growth.
As I sat down to write this, I began to think about ways that I mess up in my marriage. They don't include infidelity or making decisions that breach her trust. But they are the little things that I should strive to do better for the sake of our relationship. They are the little things that seem little for the first 10 years and humongous after the second 10.
From today on, I vow to be more cognizant of these shortcomings and to work to make a change for the sake of our relationship. Below are 5 ways I realize that I mess up every day -- let me know if you do some of the same things, and how you plan to make things better.
Related: 20 things ALL women do but hate to admit
1. Domestic duties
I've never admitted this in real life, but I need to do more around the house; more cooking, and cleaning, and washing dishes too! Those are all things that I hate to do, but I also realize that you hate to do them too. I vow to start helping out more.
2. Not communicating when I'm stressed
I'm a man: There, I said it. Sometimes as a man and husband, I suppress my feelings and emotions because I don't want to burden you. The downside of this is when I become mean and no fun to be around because you don't realize that I'm going through something. I vow to start communicating more with you.
Related: The 15 best marriage tips from the worst husband ever
3. Attempting to cure everything with sex
When you say that you're stressed, I'm happy to let you know that I can offer a stress reliever. Got a headache? I have a magic remedy. Bad day? I know what can make it better immediately. I realize that you're not always in the mood, and I'll try to refrain from always pushing up on you. Instead, I will offer an open ear that you need in order to voice your frustrations.
4. Not putting down the computer
I already know that I'm going to need a prayer on this one. I work from home, and my business is based on the Internet. I'm trying to build a dynamo of a company from the ground up. But I need to do a better job of putting the computer away and unplugging for at least a few hours in the evening. I intend on setting up a schedule and sticking to it for the sake of our marriage and our family. I realize that our family needs this business, but you need me even more.
Related: My husband's still a mama's boy - HELP!
5. Not asking what you think I'm doing wrong
I KNOW there are more areas of our marriage that my wife could tell me I'm failing at, but this is a beginning. From here on, I need to listen to what you think I could do better for our marriage and our family. Listening to you doesn't always have to include explaining or defending, and I'll try to do a better job at that.
- By Lamar Tyler
For 11 hilarious tips for undressing in front of your lover (circa 1937), visit Babble!
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Lamar and Ronnie Tyler used social media to build an online movement around promoting healthy families and marriages. You can find out more about the Atlanta based couple and their four kids on their personal blog BlackandMarriedWithKids.com or on Twitter at @blackandmarried.
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I love my wife.