How Much Does Timing Really Matter when it Comes to Dating?

Smitten, Glamour Magazine
Love + Sex
October 16, 2012

by Gena Kaufman, Glamour

Very important question of the day: Is bad timing when it comes to relationships a Thing or Not A Thing?

Yesterday a friend of mine sent me a video of a TV interview with a smart, cute, nice guy (sometimes it feels very hard to find one of those!) she'd gone out with once upon a time, lamenting "Why did I mess things up with this guy?!?" Well, we both knew what she was thinking. She'd gone out with him right after she'd broken up with her boyfriend of seven years, and she was kind of a hot mess emotionally so things just didn't work out. But fast forward a year or so and she's in a much better place, so now of course she's all shoulda coulda woulda. I've totally felt the same way!

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But how much does timing really matter? It matters, for sure, but I don't think timing alone can kill a potential relationship. It definitely affects the course of dating, but I kind of think if my friend had really been into this guy, she would have figured out a way for it to happen despite being in a weird emotional place. Maybe it would have taken some effort and a lot of time, but if you really like someone, you make it work. So I'm thinking that in addition to not being ready, this just wasn't the guy for her even if he was good on paper. I don't mean that in a "If he's really your soul mate, it will happen when it's meant to be" kind of way (I don't even believe in soul mates!), just that while timing is a factor, it's just one of many factors you have to consider and deal with if you really want to be with someone.

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But what do you think? Can timing really ruin a relationship, or is it just an excuse to end something that isn't going to work anyway? Have you ever dated someone that you think it could have really worked out with, except for the timing?

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