Honesty is the best policy. Faking your own kidnapping is not.
A Brooklyn, New York man did just that, in a failed attempt to avoid his girlfriend's anger after he avoided her for two weeks.
Rahmall Pettway, 36, spent two weeks away from his New York City home. To explain his absence to his girlfriend, he staged his own kidnapping, complete with duct tape, bruises and tales of amnesia, the New York Post reports.
His plan failed when cops found that the roll of duct tape was still dangling from his wrists.
Authorities grew suspicious of his account of events — he "couldn't recall" what happened, then later claimed two men in a light blue minivan abducted him, hog-tied him and covered his eyes. And eventually came clean, confessing that he had "gone AWOL" for a couple of weeks and didn't want to face his significant other who would be demanding an explanation.
"He's a total moron," says one law-enforcement source. "It was a pathetic attempt to pull the wool [over] her eyes."
"That's something very sick," says Lisa, a neighbour who witnessed the cops discovering a partially bound Pettway. "Just be a man and face the consequence."
"He did that just so he wouldn’t get caught by his girl? The lengths people will go not to tell the truth," another resident scoffs.
Pettway, who also goes by the surname Wallace, was charged with filing a false report.
It turns out, he has been arrested 14 times prior, mainly for robbery, marijuana and assault, the New York Post reports.
There has been no word on his girlfriend's reaction to the hoax — or if she's still with him.
Earlier this year, a young Spanish boy faked his own kidnapping to avoid having his parents meet his teacher. It didn't work either.