There’s no denying body positivity has transformed the lives of many who’ve struggled with self-image — but achieving unconditional self-love can be the hardest task of all. Just ask Anna O’Brien, better known as “Glitter,” creator of the popular plus-size fashion blog, Glitter and Lazers.
The social media influencer took to Instagram with a truth-baring post about how she perceives herself on the worst of days. This week, O’Brien revealed how a glimpse of her own reflection sent her confidence crashing.
“This morning I looked at my legs and cried big juicy alligator tears,” she wrote. “My hotel had a full length mirror and It was the first time I’d looked at my body in a really long time and been frustrated with it.”
O’Brien, who has more than 200,000 followers on Instagram, suffers from lipedema, a condition that causes the enlargement of both legs due to fat deposits under the skin.
Her post continued: “Over the past few months I’ve lost some weight, and because of losing that weight my legs look more lipedemic than before. The healthy fat that had once filled in many of the divots and creases was now gone.”
“My once smooth legs felt rough, my saddle bags were more pronounced and my eyes couldn’t help but stare at the new craters in my thighs. Noticing them was overwhelming for me. They felt ugly. They felt foreign. They felt gross.”
“I say this not to be reassured my body is beautiful, but instead to remind you that when your body changes it can be scary. Your body can feel foreign. You can feel upset. It’s not easy and frankly it’s an under discussed life change. So yes, I was in tears this morning,” she wrote.
The New York-based blogger was unapologetic in revealing what it’s like to have her body scrutinized by others: “Yes it feels weird to have strangers cheer on my weight loss as I see it so jarringly highlight my condition. Yes, even the strong feel weak sometimes.”
She rounds up reminding herself and others that part of self-acceptance is cutting yourself some slack: “We’re all human,” she wrote. “There is no one perfect in life, only the pursuit of a better tomorrow than you lived today.
“Today was rough, tomorrow will be better.”