Is it ever ok to tell off a stranger's child?

Whether it’s ever ok to discipline someone else’s child is one of the thorniest parenting topics around. So it’s no surprise that the debate has been reignited once again online by a mum seeking advice from other parents.

Taking to parenting site Mumsnet the mother wanted to know if she acted reasonably in reacting angrily to another mum when she told her son off for biting.

Explaining that she had taken her son to a theme park to celebrate his birthday, the poster went on to say that while they were in a queue for a ride, her three-year-old son went to stand by the barrier next to an older girl. A few minutes later, the mum was surprised to see the girl’s mum shout at her son before watching him burst into tears.

“Straight away I yelled at the woman for doing that to my son and she said well no one else was going to tell him off. I asked why he needed telling off and she said ds had bitten her daughter,” she explained.

The mum said she had been watching from her position nearby but hadn’t seen her son bite the little girl, nor had she witnessed any reaction from the girl to the alleged biting.

“I told the woman she should have told me if she saw ds doing something she didn’t like and I would have sorted it,” she continued.

“We both yelled for a bit (she got right in my face) until I turned my back on her to end it and she didn’t try and continue it.”

The anonymous mum wanted to guage the reactions of others about what had happened, asking whether they thought she had acted unreasonably or if they other mother was the one in the wrong.

“I know my son isn’t an angel and can be naughty, but as far as I’m aware he didn’t bite the girl,” she wrote.

“But even if he did, was I wrong to yell at the woman for shouting in his face?”

And other parents were quick to offer their opinions on the tricky subject.

“Even if he did bite her you don’t yell inches from a child’s face,” wrote one mum. “I would and have intervened and said no biting but I wouldn’t shout at a child and definitely wouldn’t yell in their face.”

“It is absolutely not ok,” added another. “We had a very similar situation in a theme park queue many years ago. DD aged 3 apparently kicked the lady in front of us. She was swinging her legs around and not deliberately kicking. The lady screamed in her face and she immediately wet herself in shock (had been dry for a year and didn’t have accidents)”

“It is not acceptable to shout at other people’s children whilst the parent is there in my opinion. What’s wrong with a gentle tap on the shoulder saying “excuse me, your child is biting my child”?” commented another parent.

But other parents believed it is perfectly OK for a stranger to tell off another child if they are doing something wrong.

“If you see a child injure or about to injure another child then I don’t think it is unreasonable to use your voice at a volume and tone that would make that child stop what it is doing immediately,” wrote one mum.

“If I saw a child about to bite mine (or mine about to bite another child, for that matter) I would certainly raise my voice to try to stop it. It’s not the time for a “now darling, please don’t do that, it’s not very nice” type parenting…” commented another parent.

“If a child bit mine, I wouldn’t tell the parent and just stand there waiting for them to intervene, I would tell the child off and stop them myself!” added another mum.

What do you think? Is it ever ok to tell off someone else’s child? Join the debate @YahooStyleUK

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