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Mom's Viral Post Reminds Us "Life Is Way Too Short to Say 'No' All the Time"

Photo credit: Facebook/Rachel Ann Carpenter
Photo credit: Facebook/Rachel Ann Carpenter

From Good Housekeeping

Last summer, Rachel Carpenter's now 10-year-old daughter, Nevaeh, asked her mother to dye her hair pink. As you'd expect, Carpenter said no. Just days later, she found herself in the hospital, praying that her little girl would survive the burns that covered 70% of her small body - the result of a fire experiment gone wrong at a church summer camp.

Carpenter remembers the first days after the accident - and the long months that followed - with horror over the severity of her daughter's injuries, but also with awe for Navaeh's bravery and relentless fight to recover. "Nothing could have prepared us for the first time we saw her. You feel helpless in the sense you can't take away their pain - no matter how much you wish it was you instead, it isn't," Carpenter told GoodHousekeeping.com. "The three months her father and I were in the hospital with her were the longest three months of my life. I was also pregnant at the time."

"She was originally suppose to be at the hospital for months longer than she was," Carpenter continued. "Nevaeh fought so hard and was so determined to do things again like shower, eat and walk that she didn't slow down until she accomplished everything she had to do in order to be released."

Nevaeh's healing process, which involved several surgeries and skin grafts, changed her mother's perspective on parenting in a big way. Carpenter's new motto: If a child's request does no harm, why say no? When Nevaeh came back, a year later, with the same inquiry - to dye her locks pink - her mother, out of reasons to say no, decided to say yes, instead. "You need to let your child live a little," she explained. "Time is not promised to anyone."

"This time last year we were in the hospital with her not knowing if she was going to live or not," Carpenter wrote in a Facebook post, with photos of her daughter's new look. "That experience taught me you never know how much time you have left with anyone. So say yes more often, and don't care if anyone thinks your child with pink hair is ridiculous!"

Ridiculous doesn't even enter the mind; magenta hair, scars and all, Nevaeh looks beautiful. Of course, Carpenter isn't about to say yes to everything her daughter requests - she's letting Nevaeh make decisions "within reason," she wrote, on this new outlook.

Her post, which has over 46,000 likes and nearly 24,000 shares, has garnered attention and support from like-minded parents who are done sweating the small stuff. "My philosophy is always say 'yes' when you can and 'no' when you have to," one such mom wrote in the comments. "Mine are adults now and they're lovely. No need to rebel against us because we were listening."

On Navaeh's future, her mother knows that her daughter will continue to make bold, exciting choices - pink hair is just the beginning. "Nevaeh still struggles some days, but she is the strongest person that I know," she told GoodHousekeeping.com. "She is the same silly, funny, wild spirit that she was before the accident."

[h/t Scary Mommy]

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