When someone sends you an email with “National Underwear Snapshot” as the subject line, you open it immediately. It was from Mark’s, and they were giving away 300,000 pairs of free Denver Hayes with dri-Wear underwear. Yes, please! Weirdly, the national snapshot revealed some interesting (and some disconcerting) facts, such as:
- 70% of Canadian men say the way underwear looks on is important when buying a new pair of underwear. Deduction: Well! Who knew Canadian men were so particular about something they’re just going to cover up with pants?
- 36% of Canadian men wear fewer than seven pairs of underwear per week. Deduction: Ew. These men will never find wives.
- 3% of Canadian men still say their mother purchases their underwear for them. Deduction: Sadly, these men will never find girlfriends.
- 46% of Canadian men are not satisfied with the way their underwear keeps them dry. Deduction: Drop the all-cotton briefs or boxers and head the super-fabric route.
My new Denver Hayes worked beautifully for a whole day—and I spent it on the bike. Thumbs up.