The never-ending equation of being a mom in the 21st century
A new Instagram reel by @babychick, now with over 1.7 million views, has struck a chord with moms everywhere by hilariously (and painfully) highlighting the immense mental load of motherhood. The video, set to a rapid-fire narration, rattles off a dizzying list of all the responsibilities moms are expected to juggle.
From signing kids up for sports to teaching them emotional regulation and ensuring they’re hitting milestones, the video encapsulates the relentless stream of tasks moms are expected to manage—and all while somehow staying sane.
The comments section is buzzing with agreement, exhaustion, and laughter.
@saroulette92: “I’m exhausted just listening to this!”
@simoneelisse: “This may be the best video on the internet right now
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@jenchenwrites: “And don’t forget to keep the romance alive in your marriage, continue to go on dates with your spouse. Have other hobbies so your life isn’t all about your kids, that way you’ll also be able to have normal conversations with other adults who don’t have kids.”
@the_4_barretts: “Don’t forget to teach your children to speak two languages
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While the video is undeniably funny, it also sheds light on a deeper issue that many moms grapple with daily: the mental load of motherhood.
Related: The mental load of motherhood: 6 new ways to share parenting duties with your partner
What is the mental load of motherhood?
The mental load refers to the invisible labor of managing a household and family life. It’s not just about doing the tasks—it’s about remembering, planning, and anticipating all the things that need to be done. It’s the constant mental checklist moms carry in their heads, like:
Who needs new shoes for school?
Did we RSVP to that birthday party?
What’s for dinner tonight, and is there even enough time to cook it?
Do we have enough sunscreen for the beach trip?
How can I teach my toddler patience without losing my own?
The mental load disproportionately falls on mothers, even in households where parenting and chores are divided. It’s the unseen burden of being the family’s default planner, organizer, and caretaker, and it often leaves moms feeling drained.
Related: A simple—and effective—way to lessen the mental load of motherhood
Why does it hit moms so hard?
There’s societal pressure on moms to be everything for everyone. Moms are expected to raise well-rounded kids, maintain a thriving career, keep a clean home, be emotionally available, stay physically fit, and somehow also find time for themselves and their relationships.
This relentless expectation creates an unsustainable level of pressure. As @saroulette92 aptly put it, the very act of listening to this list can be exhausting—imagine living it every day.
The solution isn’t simple, but It’s necessary
The video by @babychick resonates not only because it’s funny but because it brings attention to the need for change. Here’s how moms (and families) can start lightening the mental load:
Delegate and Share Responsibilities
Partners need to take on an equal share of not just physical tasks but also mental planning. Keeping track of school schedules or remembering dentist appointments shouldn’t fall on one person alone.Set Realistic Expectations
Moms don’t have to be superheroes. Prioritize what truly matters and let go of perfectionism. As one commenter humorously noted, it’s okay if your child isn’t fluent in two languages by age six.Build a Support Network
Surround yourself with a community of fellow moms, friends, or family members who can empathize and offer help. You don’t have to carry the load alone.Take Time for Yourself
The most overlooked part of motherhood is the mom herself. Self-care isn’t selfish—it’s essential. Whether it’s a solo coffee break, therapy, or yoga, carving out time for yourself is necessary to recharge.
Videos like this are a testament to the shared experiences of moms. Whether you laughed, sighed, or nodded in agreement, let this be a reminder: you’re not alone. The mental load of motherhood is heavy, but with awareness, support, and shared responsibilities, it doesn’t have to be all-consuming.
