The Boston Red Sox’s Triple-A affiliate in Pawtucket, R.I., will host “Kyrie Irving Night” on Thursday, which will feature a Cleveland Cavaliers fan wearing a LeBron James jersey sitting atop a dunk tank.
In addition to the Cavs, the Pawtucket Red Sox took aim at the Golden State Warriors and Los Angeles Lakers, as fans named LeBron, Draymond, Steph, Lonzo or Kevin will be charged double the price of admission. Meanwhile, fans wearing Boston Celtics gear will get in free. It is unclear what the many fans named Lonzo wearing Marcus Smart jerseys will have to pay, since two times zero is also zero.
Oh, and what happens if Kevin McHale shows up? Does he have to pay extra? Anyway …
“We know how popular the Boston Celtics are throughout the area,” PawSox executive vice president and general manger Dan Rea said in the press release,” and we hope that our fans will enjoy an evening that trumpets Kyrie Irving’s arrival.”
One “lucky” fan will win tickets to 11 more regular-season games, 11 hot dogs, 11 hats and 11 autographed baseballs in honor of Irving’s new number — worn this century by such Celtics luminaries as Evan Turner, Glen Davis, Marcus Banks, Mark Bryant, Shammond Williams and Randy Brown.
Because who can’t use 11 hot dogs and 11 hats?
Presumably, Irving will not attend and has not signed off on his likeness being used to sell baseball tickets, especially as it relates to pot-shots at the Cavaliers and Warriors, since he has not even held an introductory press conference with the Celtics yet. But I guess we can’t rule out such shenanigans.
Minor-league baseball teams are known to pull publicity stunts in order to fill stadiums, from the Madison Mallards signing “Diff’rent Strokes” star Gary Coleman, who was ejected from his only game in 2008, to the Huntsville Stars’ “Second Amendment Night” gun raffle in 2013, and the Ogden Raptors’ ill-conceived and extremely sexist “Hourglass Appreciation Night” in June. So, as far as promotional nights go, the PawSox could have done worse than celebrating a new All-Star in Boston.
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