The Royal Family's Christmas Traditions Are Extremely Extra

From Cosmopolitan

The holidays are upon us, which means the royal family is getting ready to have the world's fanciest Christmas with the Queen. And let me tell you, Christmas with the Queen doesn't simply consist of everyone opening their stockings, eating too many cookies, and refusing to get dressed for the day like the rest of us mortals. It's a full-blown E-V-E-N-T, packed with tradition, protocol, and a pretty strict time-table. Here's how it all goes down.

Every year around the holidays, the royals GTFO of Buckingham Palace and head to the Queen's estate at Sandringham House, which is in Norfolk. They've been doing this since 1988; prior to that year, they spent the holidays at Windsor Castle. Cool, sounds great and whatever, but how is Santa possibly supposed to deal with a place this big?

Queen Victoria is said to have popularized Christmas trees, so you better believe the royals take their shrubbery seriously. According to the monarchy's official web page on Christmas (side note: LOL), the Queen and her family "will usually put the final touches" on their tree. You know, as opposed to letting their royal aides do all the work for them or something.

Here, the Queen ponders a branch:

And speaking of Christmas trees, did you see the one outside Prince Harry and Meghan Markle's home in Kensington Palace? It's lit in every possible way.

Every year, the royal family attends the morning service at St Mary Magdalene, a charming country church that was a favorite of Queen Victoria's. The church visit includes a walkabout, where the royals dress in their coziest hats and mingle with the locals. Here's Meghan attending her first church service last year!

Per their official website, the royal family exchanges gifts on Christmas Eve instead of Christmas Day. They specifically like to do this at teatime, laying out their presents on "trestle tables." Don't even try to offer them a regular table, because a REGULAR TABLE WILL NOT DO.

The Queen also gives all members of the royal household presents, and there's a delicious-sounding tradition that dates back to her father during which she distributes 1,500 Christmas puddings to her entire staff.

Rumor has it that the royals love pranking each other on Christmas. Let's see, there's the iconic story of Kate Middleton giving Harry a "grow your own girlfriend" kit (pre-Meghan, of course!), the time Princess Diana allegedly gave Harry fake dog poop, and the time Princess Anne gave Charles a leather toilet seat.

^The face of a woman who is shook by pranks.

According to an article in The Daily Beast, Christmas dinner with the Queen is...a lot. It actually goes down on Christmas Eve (promptly at 8:30 p.m.), and is both black-tie and fully candlelit. Your Christmas Eve dinner could never, so you might as well cancel it.

Meanwhile, Christmas Day is far more low-key, and involves a simple lunch that lasts about an hour. Speaking to Good Housekeeping in 2016, former royal chef Darren McGrady said the meal "includes a salad with shrimp or lobster, and a roasted turkey, and all of your traditional side dishes like parsnips, carrots, Brussels sprouts and Christmas pudding with brandy butter for dessert. They stick with the same meal year after year."

Though sometimes they miss it due to being busy with, like, trying on crowns or whatever, Prince William and Prince Harry have a history of taking part in an annual Christmas Eve charity soccer match. Basically, it's an excuse for them to look super hunky while raising money, see?

Annnnd, that's about it!

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