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Stephen Colbert Tears Into ‘Malicious Elderly Rapist’ Trump In Memorable Monologue

“Late Show” host Stephen Colbert dismissed last week’s special counsel report, which cleared President Joe Biden of wrongdoing in the classified documents case but called him “a sympathetic, well-meaning, elderly man with a poor memory.”

“Kinda going off-road in a report about classified documents,” Colbert said, then offered an example: “Your honor, we, the jury, have reached a verdict: We find the defendant not guilty of murder, but he is ugly, and his mother dresses him funny.”

Colbert said he investigated the special counsel’s claim.

“We fact-checked this last Thursday, and it turns out Joe Biden is old,” he said, then added that Democrats have been in a panic since the report came out.

James Carville chewed off his own leg,” he cracked.

Colbert tried to put some perspective on the situation. He said that while the report may reinforce concerns about the president’s age, the 2024 choice will almost certainly come down to Biden vs. Donald Trump unless something “drastic” happens.

“Voters are just gonna have to choose between ‘a sympathetic, well-meaning, elderly man with a poor memory’ or a contemptible, malicious, elderly rapist with a poor memory,” he said.

Last year, a New York jury found Trump liable for sexual abuse, but not rape, in a civil case brought by writer E. Jean Carroll.

See more in Colbert’s Monday night monologue: