Cue the crackling fires and steaming mugs of cocoa, serenading carolers and twinkling strands of lights. For some, kicking off the holiday season means listening to Elvis' Christmas Album on repeat; for others, it's hosting a cookie baking bonanza with friends. But for Whoopi Goldberg, it doesn't fully feel like the holidays until she slips on an outrageously jolly sweater. In fact, the actress and TV host loves festive knits so much she decided to design her own. Ridiculous and whimsical, Whoopi's Ugly Holiday Sweaters for Zappos run the Chrismahanukwanzakah gamut. Playful scenes show Santa twerking by the chimney, an octopus posing as a menorah, and a mensch sitting opposite an elf. There's a style for everyone.
BUY NOW: $89, Whoopi Octopus Sweater; zappos.com
So wrap yourself up in a crazy knit and heed Whoopi's wise words and wishes for the most wonderful time of year:
On why you don't need money for the holidays to be magical.
"My holidays as a kid were great. (We just didn't wear matching sweaters. It just wasn't something we did.) But my mother made amazing things happen with no money. I don't know how she did it. I asked her years later and she said, 'Darling, what are you talking about? There's magic in the holidays.' So that thought is one that I've kept with me-is that she made magic happen and she never told me how."
On why you shouldn't get bent out of shape if someone says "Happy Holidays."
"It's important to respect all denominations all year long. In the last few months of listening to people not remember why we use 'Happy Holidays,' I just thought, Well, let me remind folks because everyone has their own holiday. They don't always happen around the same time. Ramadan may not happen at the same time as Kwanzaa, Hanukkah, and Christmas, but sometimes they do fall in the same path. And you don't know what someone believes. We don't ask, 'Are you Greek Orthodox or are you Jewish?' when we see someone. Regardless of what I believe, I say 'Happy Holidays' in case you believe something else. I say it because I want to include everybody."
BUY NOW: $89, Whoopi Mr./Mrs. Sweater; zappos.com
On her #1 Christmas wish.
"I'm hoping for a peaceful holiday, I would really like to see all the kids have a peaceful holiday. I would like to see all the adults have a peaceful holiday. I want everyone to just like take a break. This has been a bitch of a year, and I think everyone needs to take a page out of the Walter Cronkite school of holiday seasons. That is today, this week, this month, we're all going to try to do better. We're going to have a week of peace. Let's try for it. Let's go for a week of peace."
On coping with holiday stress.
"Holidays are stressful. They just are. But what you can do is keep an eye out for the folks who maybe don't have a place to be on the holidays. Scoop them up. Give them a sweater. Tell them to come and join you because it's a really hard time of the year, especially for people who have lost family members. So I think it's important that we all pay better attention to each other and make sure that we are taking care of each other in ways that we might have forgotten are important. Holidays are hard, and so whatever we can do for each other, I think we should do."
"Everyone needs to take a page out of the Walter Cronkite school of holiday seasons. That is today, this week, this month, we're all going to try to do better."
On her favorite Christmas memory.
"My mom started the turkey Christmas Eve at 9 p.m. and it would baste all night. So when my brother and I would sneak out at 2 or 3 a.m. to see if Santa had appeared, we would be sneaking out to that wonderful smell of roasting turkey and of tree sap, because my mom always had a live tree."
BUY NOW: Whoopi Baby Santa Sweater, $89; zappos.com
On why the Whoopi Baby Santa sweater is her favorite.
"It is such a ridiculous thing, you know? A little black baby Santa with a beard just makes me chuckle, so that's always been the one that I loved. I also had a little baby Asian Santa, baby Spanish Santa. I had many, many baby Santas, so each year we will probably release a new baby Santa."
On wanting to design Christmas lingerie.
"If we are able to show Zappos that our company can master sweaters, I think they'll want to branch out with us. That's the hope. Because I'd love to make sweaters and lingerie, those little sexy things under your clothes, for Christmas. All of that sexy stuff and fun stuff. Maybe even a holiday bra-who can say?"
Shop Whoopi's Christmas sweater collection at Zappos.com.
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