18-Year-Old 'Dreamed' of Being a Wife Over a Traditional Career, but Doesn't Consider Herself a 'Tradwife' for a Specific Reason (Exclusive)
Sophie Kelly has been sharing glimpses into her day-to-day life on TikTok since marrying her 21-year-old husband in July
Since her wedding in July, Sophie Kelly has been sharing glimpses into her daily routine as an 18-year-old wife in a number of TikTok vlogs
The Kansas native has been open about how she's always wanted to be a young wife and eventually a young mom, and she doesn't have any interest in college or her own career
Though her videos resemble content posted by "tradwife" creators, Kelly says she doesn't associate with the label
Sophie Kelly knows her lifestyle is uncommon for Gen-Z women her age. Her long-held ambitions — to be a wife and a mother — don't align with many of her peers' hopes to go to college and start careers before settling down to start a family.
"I just always wanted to be a young wife and a young mom," the Kansas native tells PEOPLE. "But it's not like people around us really do. It's not common in our community ... I do think I've definitely gotten my fair share of criticism."
Kelly anticipated such mixed reactions when she got married this past July, but the 18-year-old decided not to shy away from any confusion, judgment and doubt aimed her way. She posts vlogs on TikTok, which see her opening up about her experience as a young wife while going about her daily routine.
These videos — which vary in length, between around one minute to over five minutes long — see Kelly doing anything from brewing coffee to applying makeup in the popular "get ready with me" style or attempting to make homemade strawberry jam. In one video, Kelly shared a time-lapse of herself in the kitchen with overlaying text reading, "Pack my blue collar husbands [sic] lunch with me."
Related: What Is a Tradwife? All About the Controversial Lifestyle — And Why It's Having a Viral Moment
Though Kelly says she's not actively trying to fit into any TikTok trend, she does acknowledge that her videos may attract the same viewers looking for "tradwife" content, which spotlights married women who document their day-to-day homemaking routines. Most tradwives — many of whom are popular influencers — differ from Kelly in that they have many children and actively occupy "traditional" gender roles, living in subordinate status to their husbands.
Kelly says her 21-year-old husband, Jack, doesn't exert such control over her life. He is the breadwinner of their household, but the 18-year-old insists she'd have his support if she wanted to launch a career of her own.
"It's not like he always dreamed of having a stay-at-home life or anything like that," Kelly says of her husband, whom she started dating in August 2022. "It's just kind of how our lives ended up."
And despite what her social media content suggests, Kelly does have a job. She works as a barista about 35 hours a week, but the family-run coffee shop is currently on its "annual summer break," hence why she's currently filling her days with homemaking activities.
She's also just started monetizing her TikTok content, but Kelly admits that she doesn't contribute much money to their lifestyle. Jack runs his own landscaping company, and thanks to his success (and their reasonably priced rent) they've been able to live comfortably on his salary, as Kelly explained in one video answering a question about her finances.
Kelly confirms to PEOPLE that neither she nor Jack's parents help fund their lifestyle, though both families chipped in some cash for their wedding costs.
Cheyenne & Colton Lowe
Sophie Kelly and her husband, Jack,In the comments on her financial breakdown video, Kelly responded to someone asking what she dreams of doing for a future career. "I’ve always just dreamed about being a wife and a mom, school was never my thing," she wrote in reply.
It's not as if Kelly never thought about getting a college degree or starting a career of her own, she tells PEOPLE. She says both of her parents have worked for everything they have. Her mother has made her living as an attorney and a businesswoman. For some part of Kelly’s youth, she assumed her path would lead to university like many younger Gen-Z adults around her. But she wasn’t passionate about the prospect.
Instead, Kelly found her ambitions closer to home, if not inside the home, a goal stated by many of the tradwives taking TikTok by storm. Considering the similarities, Kelly says she's "right in the middle" between resonating with and rejecting the tradwife lifestyle.
One thing Kelly is absolutely certain of: she has no interest in judging these viral stay-at-home moms and wives.
"I don't like the stereotype of the tradwife. It's kind of silly to me in a way. I just don't think that people should be put in this box. And right now, it's definitely so negative," she explains to PEOPLE. "We all have different lives and we all do different things. Somebody's dream could be to be a stay-at-home wife and a stay-at-home mom, and as long as I feel like the husband's supportive, then that's totally good."
While stay-at-home motherhood might be in her future, Kelly says she's not quite ready at the moment, though she's looking forward to eventually welcoming many kids with Jack.
"I grew up with four siblings ... and I've always wanted five kids also," she explains before sharing why she wants to "wait a little bit longer" before becoming a mom. Besides the fact that she doesn't want to be a teen mother, Kelly also wants more time to travel freely. She recently enjoyed a trip to Africa and the couple spent their honeymoon in Jamaica.
Ruth Anne Photography
Sophie Kelly and her husband, Jack.Then there's the fact that she's recently started posting more consistently on social media, and she wants to follow her TikTok potential before becoming a parent.
Many of her diary-style videos revolve around the premise of Kelly's marital status — "Wednesday morning as a [sic] 18 year old wife," she captioned a video — regardless of whether or not she discusses the fact.
In the videos that do deal more directly with her being a young bride, Kelly addresses the more controversial aspects of her lifestyle head-on. She recently uploaded a video of herself making banana bread while discussing "what people assume about me as an 18-year-old wife." Kelly touched on the false — albeit common — assumptions that she's Mormon or that she got married because she's pregnant, and she also discussed strangers' doubts about the longevity of her marriage.
Still, the TikToker maintained being married young is "seriously so fun," adding, "It's so fun to do young people things ... that we did when we were dating, but then just know that this is my forever person and we're married."
As she continued baking and chatting in the 4½-minute video, Kelly noted, "I understand why people say all the comments they do too. Like it totally does make sense ... I just think it's funny when people comment on other people's lives and don't even actually know them or why they made that decision."
Cheyenne & Colton Lowe
Sophie Kelly and her husband, Jack.Kelly tells PEOPLE she had full support from her parents and most of her friends when she decided to marry 21-year-old Jack after nearly two years of dating. But she's still not immune to the common criticisms fired at young brides.
"A lot of people say that when you get married young, you're ruining your life and things like that. And I think for a lot of people, that really could be true. I don't know many other people my age that I would encourage them to get married young," says Kelly. According to Kelly, she’s several years ahead of her fellow midwesterners, many of whom seem to get married around the age of 23, if not older.
What makes Kelly an exception from her peers? "I think it has to do with a lot of the way I grew up and my maturity level," she explains. Kelly says she had to "grow up really fast" during childhood, as many of her family members dealt with serious medical issues, herself included.
"I was way more worried about if my siblings or my parents would live through the different diagnosis they had than what sport I was playing or the drama at school," she tells PEOPLE.
"I lost my hearing when I was five and have had so many surgeries," she continues. "From a young age, I had to think about like, 'Oh, am I going to go completely deaf?' or 'How do I read this person's lips?' and not silly little things that maybe other kids would worry about."
Kelly also claims that living with foster siblings fast-tracked her maturity.
Cheyenne & Colton Lowe
Sophie Kelly and her husband, Jack."I definitely wasn't sheltered from real-world situations. I knew what abuse was from a really young age, and I heard so many kids' stories who lived in our home and all the things that they went through," she says. "I just understood what real life looked like from a really young age."
Similar questions of age arise in conversations about tradwife culture, as many popular influencers are younger women who married early. So despite Kelly's reluctance to label herself that way, she understands that she may share an audience with creators like Ballerina Farm's Hannah Neeleman, who recently brought the tradwife conversation into the mainstream after a widely discussed profile in the Times of London. (Neeleman has said she doesn't "necessarily identify" as a "tradwife" herself: "We try so hard to be neutral and be ourselves and people will put a label on everything.")
Kelly invites any social media users to enjoy her content, whether or not they're grouping her in with the "tradwife" trend.
"I love engaging with people. It is fun to me whenever people message me and they're like, 'Oh yeah, I just made that today, too,' or 'I love cleaning in this way,'" she tells PEOPLE. "I welcome everybody. I think it's fun for people to see the way I'm living my life, just because it's so different from everybody else my age."
