"It Annoyed Me To No End": Americans Who Lived Abroad Are Sharing The Biggest Reverse Culture Shock They Had When Moving Back Home
As Americans, it can be hard to realize the strange or unique things about US culture until we leave. My Portuguese relatives, for example, will never understand the concept of "sick days." So when redditor Zealanderrat asked Americans who lived abroad to share their "reverse culture shocks" when they returned to the States, they sure had a lot to unpack about the things Americans probably never give a second thought to. Here are a few of their jarring experiences.
1."How uncommon it is seeing people smoking cigarettes in the US."
"I quit when I came back from Germany, and I was blown away by how often I didn't encounter other smokers when I had assumed I'd have to deal with that temptation often."
2."I lived in Russia for 18 months over 10 years ago. When I came back to the US, I spent a week in NYC and was taken aback at how nice everyone was and how shitty the subway is."
3."Going from Japan customer service to US customer service is a colossal downgrade."
"My wife and I got extremely lost in a large train station in Japan, and we had three employees helping us find our way. They were legitimately concerned, and we all celebrated when we figured out the issue. One of them even gave us his personal number so we could call him in case anything went wrong. We went back there the next day with a Starbucks gift card for each of them as a thank you."
4."It took me a second to remember that the first floor is the ground/lobby floor here every time I got in an elevator for a few weeks."
"When my mom visited me in Germany, she kept going to the first floor of the hotel thinking it was the lobby, lol."
5."I returned to the US from India. I sat down to eat at a restaurant at the airport, and the waiter immediately brought me a glass of ice water. It took me a moment to realize that this was safe to drink here."
6."The massive amount of advertising and upsells. As soon as you get on a plane back to the US, it's all 'sign up for this credit card,' 'watch these ads before and after the safety briefing,' and 'you can pay later for all this, no payments today.' It screams into your brain at every opportunity."
7."I lived in Japan for a year. Coming back to the States made me realize how dirty it is here, and people are lazy and disrespectful when it comes to taking care of the city and each other. In Japan, it's a collective effort. Public restrooms are clean. If you have trash, you put it in your pocket or purse and hold on to it until you can access a trash can. Here? People will drop it on the ground because they cannot dare to be inconvenienced. I've seen people at stop lights open their doors, leave bags of McDonald's trash on the street, and drive off so they can have a clean car."
"Of course, one of the first public restroom experiences when I came back home was in a store where there was a drainage grate on the floor, and a woman had her kid taking a piss in the grates instead of the toilet.
And don't get me started on how, if they even have the sniffles, they wear masks in public to be courteous, but here, people like to cough directly into the wind."
8."Music in restaurants is SO LOUD."
"And bars, too. It's ridiculous. They say it encourages more drinking, but for me, it means I'm finishing my drink and leaving because I can't hear the person sitting right next to me."
9."I returned to the US from Korea. It gets talked about all the time, but just how unnecessarily complicated and inconvenient our healthcare system is. Going from a system where you can see a doctor/specialist any day of the week without an appointment, know you will be covered, and have the peace of mind that you'll spend probably less than $20 to whatever we have here is just absurd to me. I also pay twice for my healthcare here than I did in Korea. We are so duped by a system that is openly robbing us and not keeping us well."
10."Flying from Shanghai back to Dallas was the biggest culture shock for me. Shanghai makes Dallas look like a ghost town. And the maglev train that runs over the city gives you a sense of scale like no other (imagine being in a jet flying over a city that just never seems to end)."
"I did the same thing, but Shenzhen and NYC. Shenzhen makes NYC look so outdated, dilapidated, and underpopulated. I still can't forget the beautiful humming sound of the subway train accelerating, unlike the wooden rollercoaster sound of the NYC subway."
11."Depending on where you lived abroad, the return to car culture is probably going to be the biggest shock. Get ready to drive everywhere again."
12."After living in Korea and Japan, I will forever appreciate the independence/individualism of American culture. Especially in Korea, it felt like I joined a gang/cult when I realized even the simplest of tasks required the consensus of the entire office. I saw a 46-year-old who felt like he didn't have enough authority to print in the printer, so we had to wait and ask the office superior hours later. It's hard to describe in a small post. I just feel like a certain kind of autonomy exists here that doesn't exist over there (regarding work)."
"I just left after working in South Korea for years, and I know what that work culture you're talking about is. Unless something perfectly aligns with someone's job expectations, it won't get done, even if it's as small as printing something on a printer they don't normally use. It's draining. I can't count how many times I tried to get something done and was blocked by some wildly arbitrary obstacle."
13."Taxes not being included in price on the sign."
"The annoying thing is when you get gas, they include tax but not when you buy anything else for some idiotic reason."
14."Pharmaceutical commercials on TV were the most shocking. Smiling, happy people talking about taking a pill to counteract the pill they were taking for (insert issue). Side effects may include mass murder, jumping from bridges, and uncontrollable diarrhea. At least you'll be smiling while you deal with all the side effects."
"It was one of the first things my American son-in-law noticed when he came to Scandinavia. Commercials telling you to ask your doctor if medicine X may be a good fit for you are totally unheard of. We go to the doctor, and if medicine X is what we need, they will prescribe it."
15."Central. Fucking. Air. Conditioning. Outside of places like the UAE, Israel, Kuwait, and Singapore, A/C is an absolute luxury. A lot of people in the US do not appreciate how good our HVAC capabilities are."
16."Getting yelled at and herded around like cattle by US customs and immigration as soon as I arrived back home. It's a huge shock to see how everyone with even an ounce of authority in the US acts after being abroad where you're treated like a human."
"That's what I absolutely love every time I come back to New Zealand. It's just, 'Hey mate, how're you doing?' In the US, the drill sergeant dressed up as a customs officer doesn't even say 'hello'; they just go straight to yelling. Then there's that fucking PAUSE every time: 'WHAT ARE YOU HERE FOR?!' 'Just a holiday.' Silence. Like, what else do you want me to say?! Are you happy with my answer? Are you not? Am I about to be arrested?"
17."Coming back from Germany/Europe, the customer service at US restaurants was SO intrusive and annoying. You cannot just sit and enjoy a meal with someone; you're constantly interrupted while talking or mid-chew. 'How is everything? Doing alright? Can I get you another drink?' I get that some people like this type of service because they're used to or expect it, but it annoyed me to no end how the server constantly interrupted my meal. Nothing against the servers themselves. It's more annoyance with the culture that this is an expected, normal kind of service."
18."I lived in South Korea for a few years. When I returned to my hometown, St. Louis, very little had changed. You can't walk anywhere in St. Louis County, and for the first time, that fact really got to me. My friends were also very sedentary and incurious, not wanting to go anywhere. I would go to a friend's house, and they just wanted to watch Netflix. I was so used to being a very active person."
19."Coming back from Norway, I was shocked at how little paid time off Americans get. I had to readjust to the whole 'living to work' mentality instead of 'working to live.' It still bugs me."
"I lived and worked in the United Kingdom for over three years. It shocked me when my managers told me that my leave started immediately — no probation time, nothing. In my first year, I had 25 days. After that, 30 days. And that didn't count bank holidays or sick time.
No place is perfect, for sure. I'm back in the States. But there are a couple of great things about living back in England, and the paid leave time is one of them."
20."Visiting a grocery shop and feeling overwhelmed by the sheer number of possibilities available for each and every item. How many varieties of ketchup do we actually need, really?"
"Ha, the first time I came back to the States after living for a few months on a tiny Caribbean island, I cried in the produce section of Kroger."
If you've lived abroad, did you have any reverse culture shocks when returning to the US? Let us know in the comments or fill out this anonymous form.
Note: Some responses have been edited for length and/or clarity.
