At 49, Sophie Grégoire Trudeau says she'd tell her 20-year-old self to 'slow down'
The former television host also opened up about how she doesn't have "all the answers."
Sophie Grégoire Trudeau is a fountain of wisdom. On March 29, the former “unofficial First Lady” of Canada was beaming as she greeted guests for a fireside chat at Toronto’s Event Centre where she served as the honorary "guest of inspiration" at The Soulful Divorcée Event, hosted by Born For More.
The former television host, who turns 50 on April 24, looked poised and confident as she spoke to a crowd of women, some of whom are seeking to reinvent themselves and take control. Others, like Grégoire Trudeau, are transitioning away from their marriage and into a new chapter of their lives.
The Closer Together: Knowing Ourselves, Loving Each Other author endured a very public separation from former Prime Minister Justin Trudeau in 2023 and has been vocal about living a conscious life and healing trauma. Keep reading to learn what the author had to say about beauty, trauma and more.
Focusing on authenticity over beauty
Grégoire Trudeau has been open about her struggle with bulimia and the quest for perfection that plagued her teens and young adulthood. After years of self work, she shared her philosophy about what makes a person truly attractive.
“Beauty has nothing to do with looks,” she said. “When someone is authentic, they’re beautiful… They’re attractive and they’re attracting. Their energy is contagious.”
For Grégoire Trudeau, cultivating an authentic life takes plenty of work.
“Staying in our authentic selves is the hardest thing we’ll ever do. Staying authentic is an act of wise defiance. It’s also an act of self-love,” Grégoire Trudeau said. “It’s hard because the forces that come against us are powerful. But the liberation that comes from accepting and expressing who you truly are and not suppressing closed-off parts of yourself will change your life.”
The importance of slowing down
Ahead of her 50th birthday later this month, was asked to share the advice she would give her younger self at 20.
"Slow down and forget about being known to the world. Just be known to yourself," she said.
She continued by sharing a memory of her father, Jean Grégoire, who died in August 2024. When she was in her teens, he would always say to her: “Stop running, baby, because you’re going backwards.”
“At the time, I would just roll my eyes,” she said, welling up with tears. “But our capacity to slow down allows a capacity to pay attention to the words, and to the love.”
Leading with love
Grégoire Trudeau admitted that she doesn't have "all the answers" in life but knows that love requires presence.
“Really, there’s nothing more. When you truly love, you’re there. You’re there with your body, with your soul, with your time," she said.
Love also means tuning into the whimsical child within. “I’m an only child and I grew up saying, ‘Hi, my name is Sophie. Would you like to play?’ I’m still that way.”
On fame and celebrity
As a public figure, Grégoire Trudeau has met some of the most powerful and influential people in the world, but is quick to point out that public persona holds little value.
“Fame and celebrity is all an illusion,” she told the crowd. “I’ve met enough people in my life — from all walks of life — to see this. We look up to and adore strangers on social media who we’ve never even met. What are we doing?”
Rather than focusing on the superficial, Grégoire Trudeau encourages us to create authentic and honest connections with others and with ourselves.
For Grégoire Trudeau, it all hinges on creating authenticity with yourself and having coherence between our brain and our heart.
“It’s the way you interact with yourself. The way you treat yourself when no one is watching. If you hadn’t seen me in pictures with the [former] PM; if you never saw me at events like this or in social media, who is left? Who is Sophie then? That’s the person I want you to meet today.”
Understanding trauma
In her book Closer Together, Grégoire Trudeau focuses on the mind/body connection and how trauma impacts all of us. As she pointed out, trauma isn’t just what happens to you, "it’s also what you needed but never got.”
As an only child, there was addiction on both sides of her family. “I had loving parents, but they had trauma of their own that they never looked at.”
If we, as parents, don’t look at our trauma, and don’t work through where we are stuck inside, then we are leaving that legacy to our children, she asserted
“It’s our responsibility to clear our inner field and to work on more fertile soil. That’s how we create healthy democracies. We stop the erosion. Don’t forget that governments, institutions — it’s all human beings," she said.
Grégoire Trudeau is a big proponent of checking in with her body to understand how its feeling or processing things, even potential triggers of trauma. By assessing her heart rate and how she’s feeling, she can recognize “the red flags” of trauma.
“Catch what’s happening in the body first,” she said. “Then pause. We don’t pause in our society. We don’t think we deserve rest. Rest is the only way the body can make sense of life. And you’re worthy of it.”
Deep breathing can help regulate the emotions and can be done anywhere — in private or in public.
“Take 30 deep breaths,” she said. “It changes everything.”
Although triggers can be difficult for people with trauma, Grégoire Trudeau welcomes them as a gift. “It’s an opportunity to look within,” she said. “Say to yourself: ‘I see you. What is it that you need in this moment? I’m curious.”
Return to self
Grégoire Trudeau stressed the importance of reconnecting with and nurturing the relationship we have with ourselves, which she considers the most important relationship we'll ever have.
“Our relationships are a reflection of how we treat ourselves. How we treat ourselves is also a reflection of how we build our first relationships in life, and how we evolve the relationships as our lives unfold," she said.
Grégoire Trudeau said it's self-betrayal when we focus on the external instead of our relationship with ourself.
“We’re told what to do with our hair, our nails, our face, our bodies, how we should manage our relationships, how we should behave in society, and what we should have in terms of success,” she said. “This is so tiring. We are dehumanizing ourselves at a rate that is alarming. There’s a high price to pay for it.”
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