Awkward! What to do when an unexpected gift comes your way this holiday.

Oh no! You've gone to meet a friend for a catch-up lunch.

The friend has an unexpected holiday gift for you. You have nothing to give in return.

Do you feel that pit in your stomach? What should you do?

Should you lie and say you forgot the gift at home?

Should you just sheepishly say thank you and feel horrible inside?

Should you even accept the gift?

Welcome back to Uncomfortable Conversations About Money, a recurring series where we will tackle challenging topics or situations around money that make you uneasy. We'll outline the problem and try to get you some usable solutions.

What to do if someone gives you a gift but you didn't get them one?

The problem: Receiving an unexpected gift is a common scenario around the holidays – and year round – that can lead to feelings of anxiety and guilt.

The advice: My expert this month is Lizzie Post, the great-great granddaughter of etiquette maven Emily Post. Lizzie Post is a co-president, author and spokesperson for The Emily Post Institute.

"This is one of those moments where that inner anxiety really starts screaming loud and you can tell it to 'Just please be quiet,' " Lizzie told me.

"It's absolutely OK to accept a gift from someone when you don't have one in return."

What to do when you receive an unexpected gift?

"When that gift comes your way and you have that moment of, 'Oh my gosh, I don't have anything in return,' say (to yourself) 'That means I need to focus on the gift that's being given to me,'' Post said. " 'I need to focus on this moment, say thank you, praise the gift, compliment the generosity.'

"Keep the focus there, because if you immediately take it over to your lack of a gift in return, we're doing two things: We're taking the focus off the generosity that your friend or family member has extended, and then we are also making the assumption that gift-giving is only done to get something in return, and I don't think that's what it's really about."

Should you say you forgot a gift when you get an unexpected gift?

It's a slippery slope if you start making excuses about your lack of a present, Post said.

"You want to stop yourself before you start making excuses for yourself, before you start lying: 'Oh! I forgot yours,' or, 'Oh! I just saw that the package got delayed on its way here.' Come on. You don't need to make up a lie in this moment."

Should you have a stash of extra gifts ready to give someone?

Post said she finds the "just because" gifts can be handy "because when you are headed to someone's house and you haven't been able to prep and go get something, it's nice to have something to turn to."

Those presents can especially come in handy when attending gatherings during the holidays. While bringing a gift for a host is not something you have to do, Post said, some people like to have a stockpile of "extra" gifts ready to go.

But, "at the same time, I'm a big fan of the sentiment behind a lot of things," Post said. "I don't want to put anyone down or say don't do it, but I think that anytime that we're gift-giving and we can really connect the gift to the person and the moment, it makes for a really quality, amazing gift."

If you're going to give from a stockpile when you receive an unexpected gift, make sure it matches the person, she said.

"If you know your friend hates bath salts, don't grab from your stockpile of bath salts, right?"

How do you say thank you for an unexpected gift?

It's OK to simply say thank you - and not feel guilty, Post said.

Should I buy a gift for the gift giver this year or next year?

"If this inspires you to get them something, go for it. You can create that moment at another time. You don't have to make up for it right now, this second," Post said.

"Take the 'should' out of it," Post added. "Etiquette isn't just about 'Do this, don't do that.' We can have a bit of nuance. ... Instead say, 'Does this inspire me to put them on the list for next year, (or) get them something right now?'"

Give some thought about how the unexpected gift makes you think about the relationship, Post said.

"Allow that to be the inspiration for what comes next. Maybe you just appreciate it, and that's OK, too."

Is it OK to turn down an unexpected or extravagant gift?

Post said this often comes up when people are in the early stages of dating and it's unclear whether you are exchanging gifts yet – or what type of gift to get.

"In general, you want to be careful about declining a gift, and yet it is within your prerogative. You can say, 'This is really too much. I wish I could, but I can't feel OK accepting this.'"

Make sure to thank someone for the spirit of the gesture and acknowledge the item doesn't quite feel like it's something you can accept, she said.

Still, "it is an awkward moment − let's not lie," Post said. "I do think that it's possible to decline that gift and move forward. But really ask yourself if you need to decline it, or is it something that you can accept and move on from and accept just the spirit of it if the actual gift itself is missing the mark in some way."

Uncomfortable Conversations How to handle grandparents who spoil kids with holiday gifts.

How do you say thanks for a bad gift?

So how do you handle your reaction if you receive a present that is off the mark or something you don't like? How do you express thanks without faking it – or being awkward?

"This is where that confident and practiced 'Oh! Thank you so much! I really appreciate you,' comes into play, Post said.

Again, it's about appreciation. Note the fact that someone is trying to be generous, and if the present strikes you as unusual, do your best to talk about the positive aspects, she said.

One gift giver's view: Giving a gift doesn't mean one is expected in return

USA TODAY reader Johnney Taylor loves giving gifts to people who aren't expecting it. He also likes paying it forward, such as buying a beer for a stranger at a local brewery.

But Taylor said he's not giving the gifts to get something in return.

"I love to give gifts to friends, family and sometimes strangers," he said. "I don’t ever expect a return of a gift, but if I do receive a gift I am grateful.

"I feel happy to gift as it makes me feel complete as a human being in making other human beings feel good."

The retired mechanical construction worker said he has had a good life and made some good money. Because he's single and he doesn't have a lot of family on his gift list, Taylor budgets $200 to $500 a month to do kind things for people or buy gifts throughout the year.

Taylor said there have been times when someone can take offense to his generosity or think he has ulterior motives, but he tries to be clear he's just trying to do something kind.

In most cases, people ask him what they can do in return for his unexpected gift.

Taylor tells them to consider helping somebody else who could use a gift or a helping hand.

We want to hear from you

Do you have an Uncomfortable Conversations about Money topic you'd like to suggest? Or would you be willing to be featured in a story about your Uncomfortable Conversation? Email blinfisher@USATODAY.com with "Uncomfortable Conversations" in the subject line.

Here are some upcoming topics. Do you have experience with this and if so, are you willing to be featured in a story?

• Should you borrow money from your family? What are the pros and cons?

• How should you split the bills and expenses when you move in with a significant other and your incomes are vastly different?

• What should you do when your spouse or partner's ex asks for money?

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Betty Lin-Fisher is a consumer reporter for USA TODAY. Reach her at blinfisher@USATODAY.com or follow her on X, Facebook or Instagram @blinfisher. Sign up for our free The Daily Money newsletter, which will include consumer news on Fridays, here.

This article originally appeared on USA TODAY: Receive an unexpected holiday gift? Here's what to do.