Bad Bunny's crying video and why it's got young men emotional
A video of Bad Bunny crying is going viral — but they’re tears of joy.
The pop star, whose real name is Benito Antonio Martínez Ocasio, posted a teary-eyed video on TikTok over his song “DTMF,” aka “DeBÍ TiRAR MáS FOToS” in appreciation of fans’ response to his new album by the same name. The album’s popularity soared this month after thousands of emotional listeners posted video and photo compilations to the song, which is about reflecting on memories with loved ones.
Bad Bunny’s reaction video, which has been viewed more than 118 million times, brought the trend to new heights — and opened up a conversation around masculinity and emotion.
“Bad Bunny signals to young men that it's not only acceptable, but also healthy to confront and express their feelings, which is something that men and young boys haven’t been taught to do,” said Sheldon Jacobs, a licensed therapist who serves on the National Alliance on Mental Illness Board of Directors. “It's really pushing and challenging those cultural norms.”
Experts say it’s crucial for young boys and men to understand the importance of showing emotion, which can contribute to building long-lasting relationships and overall mental wellness. Figures like Bad Bunny help fill the space of role models at an age when boys are highly impressionable, according to Sheldon.
The idea that 'boys don't cry' is outdated
Bad Bunny’s openness is part of a wider trend of male sports figures and celebrities opening up about emotion in recent years, according to Ronald Levant, a professor emeritus of psychology at The University of Akron and co-author of “The Problem with Men: Insights on Overcoming a Traumatic Childhood from a World-Renowned Psychologist.”
Last March, an emotional Jason Kelce made waves with his announcement that he was retiring following 13 seasons with the Philadelphia Eagles. In videos from the press conference, Kelce let his emotion show while his brother Travis also wiped away tears. In April, Justin Bieber posted a series of photos on Instagram from a performance that included selfies with tears streaming down his face.
“I think Bad Bunny fits into that,” Levant says. “It’s breaking the masculine code, stepping out of the man box, and saying, ‘Yeah, I'm vulnerable.’”
More: Justin Bieber broke down crying on Instagram. Men should pay attention.
What is 'DTMF' about, and why is it making people emotional?
Bad Bunny's sixth album is a 17-track love letter to the artist’s roots in Puerto Rico. Released on Jan. 5, the album explores the island’s history and struggles with colonization and gentrification. The album resonated with members of the Puerto Rican diaspora and beyond, inspiring creators to post nostalgic video and photo compilations to “DTMF.” The Spanish lyrics in the song translate to lines like "I should have taken more photos when I had you, I should have given you more kisses and hugs when I could." The trend reached male celebrities like DJ Steve Aoki, who captioned his video, “Wish I had more photos, miss you dad.”
“It's OK to be showing your emotions and I think it's important for somebody as famous as he is to be showing that,” says 24-year-old Daniel Gale, who lives in Orlando, Florida, and is of Puerto Rican descent. Gale said the album’s message of liberation resonated with him.When 22-year-old content creator Zachary Hill translated the lyrics, he said he broke down bawling. A video he shared crying over the song resonated with others, receiving more than 22 million views.“There's this insane authenticity behind his song and the videos that are being made behind it that really show that regardless of who you are, your gender, your age, emotions are emotions and it's OK to feel them,” Hill says.
Gender norms around emotion are changing — and experts say that’s a good thing.
The Grammy-winning reggaeton star has been credited with breaking gender norms in fashion and challenging homophobia in the past. He kissed a male backup dancer in a performance, dressed in drag for his "Yo Perreo Sola" music video and wore a skirt on a "Tonight Show" appearance.
When another reggaeton star, Don Omar, spread homophobia online, Bad Bunny tweeted: "Homophobia in this day and age? How embarrassing, man."
It's OK to cry Jason Kelce's retirement tears hold an important lesson for men
Levant said younger men, like Bad Bunny, are reacting against the strictures of traditional masculinity, the most notable of which is crying.
“That’s kind of the number one rule. If you're a boy, you get punished for crying; you're told, ‘Boys don't cry,’” Levant says.
Still, young men are growing up during a male loneliness epidemic. In a 2021 survey by the Survey Center on American Life, only 1 in 5 men said they received emotional support from a friend within the past week, compared to 4 in 10 of women. And half as many men as women told a friend they loved them within the past week.
Experts say being more open about emotion can contribute to solutions. Sheldon said it’s particularly important for young boys of color to have men of color to look up to, given that historical norms have perpetuated stigma around mental health in communities of color.
“The power of representation really does matter,” says Sheldon. “They see this and say, ‘Bad Bunny is crying, he's showing his emotions. It's okay for me to do the same thing.’”
Hale’s role covering youth mental health at USA TODAY is funded by a grant from Pivotal Ventures. Pivotal Ventures does not provide editorial input. Reach her at rhale@usatoday.com and @rachelleighhale on X.
This article originally appeared on USA TODAY: Bad Bunny's video crying is helping young men
