Bride Fuming After Friend Revealed Wedding Dress Details to Groom: 'Supposed to Be a Surprise'
"She has no sense of boundaries and self-awareness," the bride complained of her friend
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Upset bride (stock image)A bride-to-be shared on Reddit that her friend revealed her wedding dress details to the groom, spoiling the surprise
"She didn’t apologize and didn’t really realize what she had just done," the bride wrote, also noting, "She has no sense of boundaries and self-awareness"
Now, the bride is questioning if she still wants to ask the friend to be one of her bridesmaids
A bride-to-be is mad at her friend for spoiling "the surprise" by telling the groom what her wedding dress looks like.
She shared her story on Reddit's "Wedding Planning" forum, beginning by providing some context to the friendship. She said she has known "M" for three years, and the two have grown quite close and talk frequently. However, she recently has found herself increasingly put off by M's behavior toward her.
"Lately, she has done multiple things that make me question if she is really my friend, and I can’t tell if she is just an airhead who says whatever comes to mind or if it is intentional to hurt me," she explained, noting that it's made her reluctant to follow through on her plan to ask her to be one of her bridesmaids.
Things came to a head after the bride went dress shopping with her family and later sent some photos to M, revealing her dress choice.
Related: Groom ‘Upset’ That Bride Excluded His Mom and Sister from Her Wedding Dress Shopping Appointment
Not long after, the bride and her fiancé stopped by M's house, and M made an unkind comment about the bride having gained weight.
Then, while the three were chatting, M suddenly "starts saying 'oh my god your dress was so beautiful, I love the sweetheart neckline with the mermaid silhouette and the lace window in the front….” And KEPT DESCRIBING THE DRESS IN GREAT DETAIL IN FRONT OF HIM," according to the bride's post.
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Two upset women (stock image)The bride continued: "I stopped her mid sentence and said 'it’s supposed to be a surprise.' She stopped talking about it, but she didn’t apologize and didn’t really realize what she had just done. Now I’m upset. Maybe I’m a little over emotional, but I’m just feeling like at this point she’s doing these things on purpose."
While the bride acknowledged that her fiancé really still "has no idea what the dress looks like," she said she can't help but feel "super upset [as] she kind of took that surprise away from me in a way."
Her fiancé has assured her "it's not a big deal" — but the bride insisted, "It is a big deal to me and I just feel like it’s intentional almost."
Now, she is feeling even more "conflicted" about having M in her bridal party. "She has no sense of boundaries and self-awareness," the bride wrote of her friend. "I don’t really know what to feel or do about the whole thing. I’ll feel guilty if I don’t have her in the bridal party, but I don’t know if I can rely on her to be a supportive friend either."
The bride concluded her post by asking for advice and opinions from fellow Redditors. In the comments, many people urged the bride to go with her gut and not ask M to be a bridesmaid.
"Don’t include her in your wedding party. Self-awareness, kindness, supportiveness are all parts of a mature relationship — clearly she has none of these qualities. I wouldn’t trust or feel comfortable having someone like this hold such an important role for the biggest day of your life," one person wrote.
Someone else commented, "This is not a friend, this is someone who is intentionally trying to sabotage your happiness because they are jealous. I would cut her loose."
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As for M ruining the surprise about the wedding dress, quite a few commenters assured the bride that her fiancé most likely gleaned little information from the description M gave.
"If your fiancé is anything like mine and most of the fiancés out there, he will not remember what she said by tomorrow/by the time the wedding rolls in, and/or not even make the association/connections. Trust me. I just asked my fiancee: 'If I told you my dress is A-line, do you know what that is?' He answered 'A line of what?' And that said it all. 😂😂😂," a Redditor wrote.
Another agreed, chiming in: "This! Someone could describe my dress as having a pencil-pleated chiffon skirt and a puddle train with beaded lace bodice and cap sleeves and he’d be like ‘wtf is chiffon and why do the pleats look like pencils.’ Also, even with that description you’d still struggle to picture exactly what the dress looked like."
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