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TODAY show host Craig Melvin addresses comments about his 'well-behaved' children

TODAY show host Craig Melvin. (Image via Getty Images)
TODAY show host Craig Melvin. (Image via Getty Images)

TODAY show host Craig Melvin is speaking out about his experience fielding microaggressions as a Black parent.

On Monday, Melvin hosted an virtual roundtable discussion for NBC News called “Growing Up Black.” Melvin, who shares sixi-year-old Delano and three-year-old Sybil with wife Lindsay Czarniak, revealed during the conversation with other Black parents how it feels when people comment that his children are “well-behaved.”

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“They either look Black or they’re racially ambiguous and I’m always struck when someone, a stranger will say to me, ‘Oh your kids are so well-behaved,’” Melvin said. “And you know that they probably wouldn’t say that if there were two white kids sitting there who are the same age. It’s like, did you not expect my kids to be well-behaved?”

Melvin’s sentiments were echoed by Kim Gautier, a Black father, who added he believes many of the comments are based on the stigma that Black children are “loud and ignorant and over the top and just bad in general.”

“We always joke with our friends about that. We’d go to store like Target or a restaurant or something like that and we’ll get that a lot. People will be like ‘Oh my God, your kids are so well-behaved, they’re so well-spoken,’” Gautier told Melvin. “And I’ll be like, ‘Well yeah, they’re not doing anything crazy, they’re not out here like building a small model plane in the middle of the store, they’re not solving world peace in the middle of the store, they’re just being well-behaved kids.’”

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Earlier this month, Melvin shared how he and Czarniak, a reporter for FOX Sports, are parenting biracial children as Black Lives Matter protests continue around the world. Despite having a Black father and white mother, Melvin said the way his children present to the world will have impact on how they are perceived and treated.

“The reality is my kids are black,” he said. “And they at some point will have to become aware of the fact that that is how society views them. I think for some children it's a little trickier because you see both in yourself and you have these identity issues.”

Introducing conversations around identity has been of top of mind for Melvin and Czarniak, which he admitted is new territory for both of them.

“So we're starting to talk about how we're going to be able to help them navigate issues that we didn't have to deal with,” Melvin said. “My wife is white, she grew up white, I grew up black, that was it. It's a weird thing.”

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Melvin added that now more than ever it’s important for parents to raise children who are cognizant of race and bias - and to not avoid having difficult conversations.

“We like to think that we live in some sort of post-racial America, and the reality is we are reminded time and time again that we do not,” he explained. “I think we like to celebrate more than anything racial ambiguity. I think a lot of people have convinced themselves that we are a lot farther along.”

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