Feeling Stressed? Therapists Say You Should Try This Trend
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Picture yourself wrapped up in a fuzzy blanket with a steaming cup of chamomile tea and scented candles flickering as you binge-watch your favorite shows or immerse yourself in a good book. If this sounds enticing, you’re into cozymaxxing.
Cozymaxxing, or cozy maximizing, is a self-care concept and wellness trend that’s become popular on TikTok and other social media platforms, says Don Grant, Ph.D., national advisor of healthy device management at Newport Healthcare. “The goal of cozymaxxing is to help discharge stress and encourage relaxation and mental health well-being.”
TikTok videos tagged #CozyMaxxing feature people snuggling with pets, taking hot baths, sipping warming cocktails and curling up under the covers. Cozy-centric self-care rituals may be extra appealing now as people tend to feel “perpetually busy and perpetually behind,” and doing something comforting “might feel criminally indulgent,” says Michelle Quist Ryder, Ph.D., a social psychologist and the CEO of the American Psychological Foundation. “I think trends like this become popular on social media because they give voice to a need that we might be ignoring — or maybe that they give us permission to do something that we want to do, but we’re not sure if we’re supposed to want to.”
If you’ve been looking for an excuse to pause your busy schedule and just sit with a coloring book or magazine, it’s probably time to embrace cozymaxxing. Many mental health pros seem to agree that this wellness trend could actually have some benefits. Keep reading to find out why — and then follow their tips to cozymax the right way.
What is cozymaxxing?
The environments where you live and work shape how you function, says Mollie Candib, LCSW, a psychotherapist and owner of MSC Therapy. “Cozymaxxing refers to intentionally creating spaces that foster feelings of calm, warmth and safety,” and encourage you to rest, relax and generally look after yourself.
Cozymaxxing is closely related to other concepts for creating relaxing or aesthetically pleasing environments, like nesting, feng shui, wabi-sabi or hygge, says Grant, whose cozy routine includes dimming lights, sitting in his favorite leather armchair, putting his devices away and reading a book like The Count of Monte Cristo.
“It's about reducing friction and stimulation while increasing feelings of warmth and contentment,” Quist Ryder says. Her version of cozymaxxing is “wedge-and-veg,” which involves cuddling up with a wedge-shaped pillow and a thick, fuzzy blanket to watch reruns of old TV shows.
Cozymaxxing has gained traction on social media because it “legitimizes the urge” to relax, says Quist Ryder. “Instead of being a guilty pleasure, it’s the responsible thing to do for your mental health.” That’s more important than ever, as everyone is adjusting to uncertainty and upheavals in today’s world, including politics, climate change, economic challenges and more.
The trend is a rejection of hustle culture, too, adds Candib, who enjoys taking a few minutes every day without her phone to reflect. It also normalizes the need for alone time to recharge, she says.
Does cozymaxxing offer mental health benefits?
You bet! “I think cozymaxxing is an arrow aimed straight at the bullseye of stress reduction,” says Quist Ryder. Stress keeps your nervous system revved up so you’re ready to react to danger — a.k.a., fight or flight mode. “It’s not particularly good at differentiating between a looming predator and a looming deadline,” so stress can leave you feeling anxious, she adds.
Cozymaxxing, or otherwise choosing calm and relaxation, supports the parasympathetic nervous system, which relaxes your body after times of stress, Grant adds. Essentially, it tells your brain to chill out and triggers the release of feel-good hormones like dopamine and serotonin as well as endorphins, which improve your mood, put you at ease and help you sleep better, Grant says.
Reducing stress brings many other benefits, too, including improving memory and cognitive function and giving you more energy, says Quist Ryder. It can also help you regulate your emotions and appetite, Grant adds.
Because cozymaxxing involves comforting, familiar rituals (think: rewatching a favorite movie), it brings a sense of security and stability, Quist Ryder says. “Your brain doesn’t have to process anything, doesn’t have to worry about anything. It already knows what resources it’s going to need. It’s in control.”
Are there any downsides to cozymaxxing?
To reap the many benefits of cozymaxxing, don’t go overboard or obsess so much about creating the perfect space to relax, which could inadvertently cause more stress. “We don’t need to wait until we have the perfect reading corner to read; it shouldn’t be a goalpost that prevents us from being our best selves now,” says Stephanie Wijkstrom, LPC, founder of Counseling & Wellness Center of Pittsburgh.
Remember, cozymaxxing should be a “stopping point to rest and restore,” not an escape, Quist Ryder says. If you’re using it to avoid things you don’t want to face, those stressors may pile up and end up causing more problems for you. If you struggle with social anxiety or procrastination, cozymaxxing could “reinforce cycles of avoidance,” adds Candib.
“It’s important to be honest with yourself about your real intention for cozymaxxing, and also set (and keep) committed boundaries and parameters around it, regarding both the time spent in it and the frequency,” Grant says.
Keep in mind, too, that cozymaxxing isn’t a substitute for mental health treatment, Wijkstrom emphasizes. “It’s a nice adjunct to your regular self-care practice. It’s a stepping stone to making healthier choices.”
How to “cozymax”
There are no rules with cozymaxxing — it’s about individual preferences.
Think about what brings you peace. Choose activities and spaces that reduce stress and anxiety and promote relaxation for you, Grant says. Then, what’s important is “allowing yourself permission to retreat into them without any feelings of guilt or shame.”
Pinpoint a stress-free space in your home. It might be a phone-free nook where you journal, or a favorite spot on the sofa to snuggle with your puppy under a warm blanket. Don’t feel pressured to buy scented candles or an expensive weighted blanket, she adds. “It doesn’t have to be curated for anyone else, and it doesn’t matter how aesthetically pleasing it is — it just has to feel good to you.”
Tune into your body. Try to avoid scrolling social media or responding to emails so that you can focus on yourself, Grant says. Consider stimulating your senses by dimming the lights, infusing the area with a nice scent or playing relaxing music. You may want to journal, draw, create a craft, read, watch TV or take a bath — whatever you find calming.
The bottom line
Yes, cozymaxxing may provide the mental health boost you’re craving. Just remember that it can’t replace mental health treatment if you’re struggling. “Cozymaxxing can be one tool in your toolbox of things that make you feel better, but it ultimately shouldn’t be the only fix,” Candib emphasizes.
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