The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week (Sept. 7-13)
Kids may say the darndest things, but parentstweet about them in the funniest ways. Although Twitter has rebranded to X, the humor lives on.
Every week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on the social media platform to spread the joy. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents for more!
My daughter told me there is a small get together at school on Friday.
I asked her, "How small?"
She replied,
"Just you, me, and the principal.— єℓαιηє (@elainesim28) September 10, 2024
me: did you have fun on your playdate?
my 9yo: yes, but that was the wrong Logan. Next week can I have a playdate with the Logan who's my friend?— Daddy Go Fish (@daddygofish) September 9, 2024
I left my wallet in the car and asked my 9yo if I could borrow $3. He gone say “look at me carrying this family on my back”.
Boy…💀💀💀💀— Princess | Mindfulness | Conscious Parenting (@themultiplemom) September 10, 2024
my kid came home from toddler gymnastics with a truly breathtaking item pic.twitter.com/vE97lGLFkM
— Seth Rosenthal (@seth_rosenthal) September 10, 2024
so much of parenthood is pointing out to a baby that the thing they’re asking for is in fact already on their highchair tray
— Sophia Benoit (@1followernodad) September 11, 2024
4 year old has a new bit where he pretends to have a fatal scooter accident. it’s very funny but the other patrons of the farmer’s market seemed alarmed pic.twitter.com/MTBjbvRAzm
— pipperberry 🍉 (@pippercorn) September 8, 2024
me: *has a day off*
my kid: *coughs*
me: no— meghan (@deloisivete) September 12, 2024
My 15 yo packed 0 underwear for this 8 day vacation.
— Dadman Walking (@dadmann_walking) September 12, 2024
Telling my son he can’t stay home from school for no reason even though when I was his age I’d blow dry my forehead and tell my mom I had a fever.
— @itssherifield (@itssherifield) September 11, 2024
My son said he has an idea for a movie called Tornado Watchers. He said "it's basically just a copy of the movie Twisters." I feel like he has what it takes to make it in Hollywood.
— Kristen Mulrooney (@missmulrooney) September 7, 2024
*Hour 3 in the trampoline park*
My oldest has said “watch this” 212 times
My youngest is running wild in a pack of feral six-year-olds
A woman screams in the distance “Jaden, Jaxon”
There is still no bar— meghan (@deloisivete) September 8, 2024
Having kids is fun because you get to relive all your childhood diseases together
— Real Life Mommy (@reallifemommy3) September 10, 2024
Frustrated with my 23 y/o daughter I said, "God, give me patience" and she replied, "when you ask for patience, God doesn't magically give it to you. He gives you opportunities, like this one, to become more patient" and now she's grounded until she's 40
— 🌜🤷♂️ 🤯Dad Moon Rising🤯 🤷♂️🌛 (@raoulvilla) September 10, 2024
My 19mo baby learned one full sentence and it is "I want BLANK too" so now any time the older kid gets anything she can scream "I WANT COOKIES TOO" or whatever, otherwise she can barely talk and truly children are so inspiring.
— Lucy Huber (@clhubes) September 9, 2024
Forget packing a hospital bag for your first baby, instead write a list of everything "you'll never do" as a parent. Makes a fun drinking game on their first birthday
— sarah (@sarahradz_) September 8, 2024
It's all fun and games and "let the children explore their environment, uninhibited 🥺 🫶🏼" until the 1-year-old finds a tampon in your purse and runs around with it screaming for you to open it for him because he thinks it's a string cheese
— Amy Colleen (@sewistwrites) September 10, 2024
I miss the person I was before my kids started using the word skibidi.
— Hollie Harris (@allholls) September 12, 2024
Every school email takes parents a step closer to couples therapy
— Vinod Chhaproo (@Chhapiness) September 10, 2024
My 6yo told me just before bed she had a quiz the next day so when I questioned why she didn’t tell me when I asked her if she had homework earlier she said “You asked me if I had homework, not a quiz, duh.”
In other news, there’s a kid on sale on eBay.— My Life As Dad (@milifeasdad) September 12, 2024
