Gentle ways to wean off the pacifier or thumb-sucking, from a pediatric dentist

toddler sucking their thumb on mother's lap Gentle ways to wean off the pacifier or thumb-sucking
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Weaning little ones off pacifiers or thumb/finger-sucking is a common concern for many parents. Every child reaches milestones at their own pace, so the right timing for breaking these hard-set habits varies. However, it’s generally recommended to stop pacifier use by around 12 months of age.

As a board-certified pediatric dentist and mom, I see many kids enter my practice with a pacifier or thumb-sucking habit—and my own son loved his pacifier! Thumb-sucking is perfectly normal for babies; many even do it in the womb. But if the habit persists beyond 3 years old, it can potentially lead to functional orthodontic issues like excessive flaring of the front teeth, open bites, and a high vaulted palate. Here’s what I typically recommend to my patients who are looking to help their kiddos wean off the pacifier or thumb/finger-sucking.

Set up a dental home

One of the key benefits of taking your little one to a pediatric dentist by age 1 is establishing a “dental home.” This allows the dentist to educate you on good oral hygiene habits, discuss any habits your child has and come up with a strategy to help discontinue them. The effects of pacifier use and thumb-sucking really depend on the frequency, duration and whether the habit is passive or active.

Significant active pacifier use and prolonged thumb-sucking can lead to some or all of the following issues:

  • Teeth misalignment: A prolonged habit will flare the upper front teeth and push the lower teeth back, which creates a large space between the top and bottom teeth. This leaves a child more prone to cause trauma of their front teeth when accidents happen.

  • Narrow palate: If the tongue is pushed down instead of being in the correct position due to a poor habit, this can lead to a narrow upper jaw and affect proper development of the palate. This is also seen with babies who have tongue ties.

  • Speech issues: Speech and articulation issues are seen in children when the tongue is not in the correct position and also when there is an open bite present.

7 gentle tips for weaning off thumb-sucking or pacifier use

So what are some tips for stopping these habits? Here’s what I suggest.

1. Reduce usage

Minimizing the frequency of the habit helps immensely. If a child uses a pacifier or sucks their thumb while they go to sleep, I always recommend taking it out. Diminishing the habit and slowly decreasing over time helps to eventually stop the habit.

2. Find the right substitute

Replacing a pacifier or thumb with another object such as a stuffed animal, soft toy, blanket, lovies, chewie or fidget toy can replicate that soothing feeling. Cuddling and reading stories as a bedtime and naptime ritual can also provide that sense of comfort for those seeking more snuggles and security.

3. Positive reinforcement

For my son, this method worked the best. As parents, we tend to say “no” a lot. Instead, praise and encouragement along with small, gradual, age-appropriate rewards helped him to eventually eliminate the habit.

4. Distraction

Another approach is to remove the pacifier or finger and engage the child with songs, a toy or game to help redirect the attention away from the habit.

5. Routines

Consistency and routine is so important for children. Creating and sticking to one that does not involve the habit can help your child immensely.

6. Teamwork

Encourage open communication and involve your little one in the process. For my son, my husband and I would use books to show him pictures in the story. We would show him books with older characters without pacifiers. You could also set up a pacifier send-off party and help your child package up their pacifier to (pretend) gift the pacifier to a new baby.

7. See a pediatric dentist

When all else fails, your pediatric dentist can provide customized habit-breaker appliances or tips if needed.

Recognize the benefits

As moms, it’s natural to feel guilty about eliminating these habits. But focus on the long-term benefits for your child’s dental health and speech development. Find support in your community, whether it’s other moms who have similar concerns, or your pediatric dentist. Be patient, consistent, and celebrate every little win! Remember, transitions can be hard for all of us (adults included!) Most importantly, take care of your own emotional and physical well-being as you go through this season. Every child is different, and it might take time or different methods to find what works.

With the right approach and a strong support system, you’ll successfully navigate this transition. Hang in there, and remember, this too shall pass!