Groom’s Brother-in-Law Wants to Skip His Wedding Because Wife Isn’t Going: ‘I’ll Be Dateless and Uncomfortable’
“… The idea of now going out there alone to be with her family for a wedding where I'll know [four] people ... and be jet lagged... sounds horrible,” he said
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Portrait of a happy young couple standing with their bridesmaids and groomsmen on their wedding dayA man is indecisive about attending his brother-in-law’s wedding, especially since his wife is unable to attend.
The 42-year-old man shared in a post on Reddit’s popular "Am I The A------" forum that he and his wife had initially been “on the fence” about going to her brother’s wedding due to their hectic schedules, as he worked a full-time job and she “got accepted to a rigorous masters program.”
What makes matters a little more complicated is the fact that the wedding will take place “across the globe” for the couple, and the man said that he would only be able to take off “five work days max” and have to return “to work with no recovery time from the 17 hour time difference.”
He said that his wife figured that she would not be able to attend the nuptials because of the schedule for her masters program and she and her brother are suggesting that he attend the wedding without her — an idea that he isn’t the most keen on.
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Stock photo of Wedding, photography and photographer with bride and groom posing for a picture with wedding guests outdoors. Photo, camera and friends and family celebrating with just married couple at parkRelated: Guest Is 'Uninvited' from Friend's Destination Wedding After Spending More Than $1K on Flight
“It's all her family and [my brother-in-law’s] friends [attending the wedding]. I'll only know my in-laws and BIL, and it's a massive wedding ... and I'll be dateless and uncomfortable,” he wrote, adding that he is “a massive introvert.”
He said that though he wanted to “support his wife and her family,” he was only “willing to endure that kind of turn around travel” if his wife went with him. However, she told him that she wanted him to go “to resolve some of the guilt she feels about missing her brother’s wedding.”
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“… The idea of now going out there alone to be with her family for a wedding where I'll know [four] people and be jet lagged then have to turn out and be jet lagged to resume work sounds horrible,” he wrote.
“... [Her] brother also texted her that he understands and hopes I will at least attend,” he continued. “I feel [pressured] and uncomfortable. AITA for deciding to skip?”
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Stock image of wedding reception table.Several people in the comments noted that they felt that he was reasonable for not wanting to attend since it was a “destination” wedding. One person wrote, “One has to be considerate of the guests they’re inviting. Hopefully your BIL will respect [it[... Send a nice gift, condolences for your absence, and move on.”
Another chimed in, “don't let anyone (including your wife) make you feel guilty about not attending,” adding, “If it was so important for family members to be there, the couple would not have planned a destination wedding on the other side of the world.”
One person added that destination weddings are “difficult and expensive” and that he shouldn’t “feel bad about turning down a wedding invitation, ESPECIALLY to a destination wedding.”
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