Hello Hot Rabbi: How Religion Found Its Sex Appeal
Before I finally sat down to watch Nobody Wants This, I'd already been subjected to countless conversations about it. The television show has infiltrated WhatsApp groups and water cooler talk across the globe. On public transport, I find myself tuning in to soundless snippets of Adam Brody via strangers' iPhones as they binge the new Netflix series; such is the moreish appeal of the rabbi-gentile romcom.
It's easy to see why it's cut through in such a huge way, garnering 10.3 million views during its first four days of streaming. The protagonists, sex podcaster, Joanne (Kristen Bell), and not-your-average rabbi, Noah (Brody) have genuine chemistry, the achingly millennial references are contemporary (Joanne hates dating apps and doesn't want her podcast to be a Call Her Daddy ripoff), and yet there's a real nostalgia in watching Brody play essentially a grown up version of Seth Cohen, his breakout role in cult teen drama The O.C.
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And then there's the fact it taps into a growing cultural phenomenon: sexy religious leaders. The 'hot Rabbi' in Nobody Wants This isn't just Joanne's new crush, but the nations. Any why not! He's cute, compassionate and kind. He's community-minded and non-judgemental. Noah Roklov (the character's full name, FYI) posses all the typical qualities you'd associate with a good religious leader, which it turns out, are kind of hot.
Inevitably, part of the appeal is the character's intrinsic lack of availability. Like Fleabag's 'hot priest' before him, Noah is not supposed to date a secular woman. And like Phoebe Waller Bridge's character, Joanne is a committed atheist. But these sexy stalwarts of religion don't just represent forbidden crushes. Somehow, they've become archetypal on-screen heartthrobs. Not just hot, but in possession of a mystique that comes from being hot and religious.
The rabbi from Nobody Wants This joins a growing lineup of religious romantic protagonists. Who doesn't remember Samantha lusting after 'Friar F*ck' in Sex And The City? In Granchester, James Norton played an Anglican Vicar. There's Nicholas Chavez's lauded performance as Father Charlie Mayhew in FX series Grotesquerie. Jude Law in The Young Pope. On set photos from the third film in the Knives Out franchise suggest Josh O’Connor is about to take on a priest role.
In a secular society like the UK, many of us have a complicated relationship to organised religion. Growing up, my mother was forced to go to church every Sunday and hated it, while my father identified as Hindu and Buddhist at different points in his life. Neither impressed religion on me, and I was left to decide it for myself – I ultimately chose against it. Instead, I make up one of the UK's estimated 25 million non-religious population: in the 2021 census of England and Wales, for the first time in its history less than half of the population (46.2%) described themselves as 'Christian', a 13.1 percentage point decrease from 59.3% in 2011.
But while religion continues to be in decline in the UK (across all faiths), our infatuation with hot religious on-screen leaders continues to rise. In a society increasingly wary of institutionalised religion, we seem more comfortable flirting with its tropes than engaging with its reality. We are drawn to symbols of faith, but only if they come wrapped in romance and irreverence. Characters like Noah Roklov allow us to explore religion and spirituality from a safe distance.
In an uncertain world, increasingly we look for meaning, purpose and a sense of community. These are all cornerstones of religion, and yet, in a secular society, the idea of a non-religious person exploring religion can often feel culturally unacceptable – taboo even. It's much easier to worship at the alter of a hot priest, than say, visit an actual alter. But the rise of religion in romcom speaks to a tension between our fascination with religion—in a fun, sexy form of course—and our discomfort with real religious expression.
Of course, religion at its core isn’t about hot men. But maybe through them, in a fictional sense, we can ask questions about what it means to possess that most elusive and testing of things: faith. Characters that show such devotion and fortitude offer a way to flirt with the divine without actually committing to anything. Maybe we’re all just searching for something we can believe in, even if it’s only for the length of a Netflix series. And in the words of our favourite new hot Rabbi, 'is there a world where this works?'
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