Kelly Clarkson: "If I'm Skinny One Day or Bigger One Day, That Ain't Gonna Change How I Sound"
OG American Idol star Kelly Clarkson is all too real. And at the recent SHE Summit in New York City, where she helped to promote the new Citizen watch and talk about all things related to female empowerment, Clarkson - who's also recently been promoting her children's book River Rose and the Magical LullabyRiver Rose and the Magical Lullaby - was especially honest. (What else can you expect from a pop star who has disclosed that she relies on wine to get through the toughest parts of motherhood?)
And given her reputation for speaking the brutally honest truth (yes, even about her weight - more on that later), she's a stellar role model for both moms and young women. It's proof that she ought to be in the limelight more often. Here, a few highlights we heard from her:
Were any lessons or experiences growing up as a child of a single mom that kind of prepared you to be a mother ?
Well to start with, every time I see my mom, I'm just, I'm in awe of how she did it. She had three kids living under one roof in this tiny apartment, and she worked and put herself through school, and became a teacher, and was the director of a day care... And she really got the shaft from my biological father and was just handed all this stuff with no help. Now, as an adult, I understand that must have been so hard, you know? We have four kids [Clarkson has two children and two stepchildren], but I have help. I don't know how my mom did that, it's, I'm in awe of it.
And here's the funny thing: There are millions of women and men that do the same thing, that raise their kids alone. It's hard enough with a partner, you know? I think watching her though [was] really cool for me because it taught me that I can accomplish anything. We were so poor - I mean, living paycheck to paycheck - and it was a very hard thing for her. I think it was very good for me to see that, in a sense, because I am really appreciative of what I have and what I work for.
And that's why I work my butt off - because I don't wanna be there. But I know that if it did happen to me, I'd make it, 'cause she made it. And I think it's important.
That's my fear with my kids, especially my younger two, that they won't experience some of the hardships that helped mold my husband and I into these very independent beings that can handle quite a bit. But I try to show them how to be appreciative and respectful and take them to things where they can see other people that don't have the benefits that they have right now.
How do you teach your little girl [River Rose, 2] to be empowered?
I have a lot of mom guilt. I was just talking about this ... If you're a mom, you want to be with your kid everyday. You don't want to miss a moment, you want her to need you and want you and not want somebody else.. But I think it's really important not only for my little girl and our 15-year-old girl and our boys to see that a woman is capable of kicking ass while also being a kickass mom.
I'm not gonna BS you, that's hard. There are days where I cry like and I'm like, "I don't know if I can handle all this!' or get it all done. But at the end of the day, 99 percent of the time, it's awesome and it's worth it and that's what I say to myself.
There are days where I cry like and I'm like, "I don't know if I can handle all this!'
I try to just be a confident female for her - and I believe actions obviously speak louder than words, it's an old saying but it's very true. I'm sure [all of my kids will] end up in therapy for something. But I hope it won't be for lack of confidence. And, I want my boys to not be afraid of that. It's a turn on [for my husband] that I'm a pretty badass female; boys that I dated before, they got intimidated by it, that's not fair to me because I work very hard. So I'm glad our boys and also our girls have a man to look [up to], who shows them, 'this is how treat a woman, this is how you respect a woman.' He takes his daughter on dates and shows her, 'this is what a guy should do.'
In the press last year, a lot of people commented on how your body looked. As a mom, as somebody who is in the spotlight, and as a woman, how do you deal with the criticism about your body?
But as a mother, and as an aunt, and as a sister, and as a daughter, I think it's very important for me to be very open about my weight and people asking about it. Obviously, this is not my goal weight, if anyone's asking, but I had two kids. I felt like I was perfect for three years. And I didn't want to lose the weight back then, I knew I was gonna have another kid. It's hard for me, a lot of physical things going against me, so I think it's important to tell girls that Photoshop is not reality, that's not what we look like, that's not what we want people to see. This [her body] is real, and this is what's happening right now, this is what I'm rocking. I'm just gonna do me and I'm gonna go at my own pace and I'm gonna do my thing, and if I'm skinny one day or bigger one day, that ain't gonna change how I sound. I still sound pretty dang good. And my talent is why I'm here.
If I'm skinny one day or bigger one day, that ain't gonna change how I sound
It's also part of this industry, so you just have to swallow that pill and get over it. But at the the same time, I think it's great that people always bring it up with me because I get to say, "screw you, I don't care what you think." Don't be me then, do you. I've always been very confident though - I'm kind of that kid that's like, when you tell me not to do something, I'm gonna be like, "ohh, OK, watch me do this." And I think that God, the universe, or whatever, knows that about me. I'm the happiest I've ever been and I can't even believe my life sometimes. I'm so fortunate, and that's what I focus on.
(Clarkson's answers have been condensed for clarity.)
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