Man Says His Sister Won’t Pay Back $2,500 He Let Her Borrow for Her Dog’s Vet Bills: ‘Deteriorated Our Relationship’
“Essentially she is calling me an unsympathetic a------. But am I?” the man, 35, asked on Reddit
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Two people fighting (stock image)A man is wondering if he’s in the wrong after asking his sister to pay back a $2,500 loan.
The man, 35, turned to Reddit’s popular Am I the A------ forum on Nov. 7 to share that he lent his sister, 27, money to help with her dog’s vet bills and that she was supposed to pay him back on Nov. 1.
“She said she would have the money on that date,” he wrote. “I have this in writing via text. I've never lent my sister money before and I generally trust her. I didn't care for her dog, but she loved it.”
He revealed that the dog died on Oct. 15, adding that his sister “was devastated." However, this did not stop him from requesting repayment on their agreed-upon date.
“On Nov. 1, I asked her to Venmo me the 2500,” he shared to the forum. “She blows up on me asking how I could ask her for money when she is still grieving. She says it's only been 2 weeks since the dog died and she isn't ready to move on.”
“I told her I'm not telling you to move on, I'm telling you to pay me what I'm owed,” he added. “I asked if she is saying she is not paying me back. She called me an a------ and hung up. I texted her a screenshot of her agreeing to the 11/1 date. She ignored me.”
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The man also shared that while he can technically live without the money, “2500 is not an insignificant amount,” adding that he has since learned that the vet bill was more than $7,000 and that his mother contributed $2,000 to help out as well.
“I have no idea what my sister's finances are like, but i'm guessing they are not good,” the man continued. “She is now 7 days late and I haven't seen a dime. We've had several arguments and this has really deteriorated our relationship. Essentially she is calling me an unsympathetic a------. But am I?” he asked Reddit.
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Redditors are mixed on the best way to handle the situation.
One person agreed that the money should be paid back in full, while also providing some context for what the sister might be going through.
“She should be working with you to pay the money back, even on a payment plan,” they wrote. “But I recently had a pet pass after about $7-8k of trying to save him. If she borrowed from you and your mom, there’s a chance she borrowed from others too and she’s probably feeling backed against a wall of owing a lot of people a lot of money.”
“I know for my pet, it wasn’t just the ER bill.” they continued. “It was follow up appointments ($$$), follow up testing ($$$), medication, and ultimately a costly cremation. She still needs to have a conversation with you about how to go about paying you back, but it might be worth a conversation from you to see what the situation really looks like for her financially.”
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Other people agreed that a payment plan may be the best solution for moving forward, prompting the original poster to reply, “She seems to have zero interest in paying me back anything right now. I may consider that, but she has burned a bridge with me.”
Another person then chimed in, calling the original poster out on what they consider his “black and white” approach.
“A bridge was burned after a week?” the user asked the original poster. “A month, OK. Fair. But you've said yourself you don't need the money per se, and that this is all principle. Well, along with principle should come grace. Life isn't black and white. Yes she should absolutely pay you back in a timely fashion, and I totally understand if it EVENTUALLY burns a bridge.”
“It's been a week,” the person continued. “Have a smidgen of grace and offer your sister the benefit of the doubt. This is a bit OTT [over the top] as far as I'm concerned. Go ahead and be a bit annoyed, but to be talking burnt bridges is crazy to me.”
