Munroe Bergdorf: 'None Of Us Are Islands - We Need Connection; We Need Love; We Need To Feel Seen.'
Trans women carry the burden for society because we are an easy target. We pose no threat to anybody except the people who want to uphold a system in which we are all threatened with violence if we deviate from gender roles. If we’re talking about one of the most pertinent realities for trans people in this hostile culture then it’s the decimation of transgender healthcare, an effort to eradicate us by making it as difficult as possible to medically transition. But no matter how hard you make someone’s life, you cannot stop them from existing. It’s something we’ve seen throughout history with every single marginalised community: the harder you make it for them to exist, the more you stoke the fires of resistance.
And we cannot wait for change. We need to make sure that we’re creating the tomorrow that we want today. If we’re looking for the new government to save us, then we’re putting power in the wrong place. Our power needs to be with each other, because no one knows more about what we need than us. We need to think about our community, rather than what we are asking the world to give us.
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Right now, I think the most damaging thing is the mental-warfare aspect – and I know that is the point. I don’t necessarily think it is what [governments] can implement because so many of our rights are tied up in other legislation that protects all gender identities from discrimination. Together, the way that we counter this feeling of living under constant duress is by sharing information and highlighting the reality that we can provide for each other as a community. The more people that are educated on what is possible and the lengths that people in power must go to, to implement what they are threatening, the less daunting it seems.
A lot of the way that we’re feeling now is because a threat can force you into a state of panic, but there is hope around us and finding it can be a lot simpler than you think. At the beginning of my transition, I looked for hope. I understand why that’s necessary, as people need context: you need to know that you’re not alone and to have confirmation that other people like you exist. My sense of self was once shaped by what others thought of me; I put the power in other people’s hands. But I’ve come to realise that we have the answers ourselves. A lot of it is within us. Of course we need guidance and we need role models, but there comes a point where we can’t just look for hope externally.
Searching and finding hope isn’t linear for trans people, as we are constantly having to be on the defensive. I don’t think that’s any way to live. This might sound corny, but joy and living a fulfilled life is resistance in itself: if the forces of repression had their way, we would all just be constantly fighting for our lives. There needs to be a balance of fighting for each other but also living the life that you have created.
It’s important for trans people to understand, as I have come to do, that none of us are islands: we need connection; we need love; we need to feel seen. I find hope in my community: looking at the paths that other trans people are treading. I also try to help others find hope by offering my perspective and guidance to younger members of the community.
In London especially, our community continues to grow, with more trans people becoming politically engaged and wanting to see change than ever before. We’re no longer in the shadows, and this sense of visibility and tangible growth in resistance is something to hold on to. To live in a city with the biggest trans pride in the world is a massive source of pride for me. I find it a great moment of clarity for myself, my perspective and the community that cuts through the noise.
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