People Are Revealing The Surefire Way To Tell If Someone Is A Douchebag, And I Haven't Seen Accuracy Like This Since Atomic Clock

Aside from being a tool for spraying a vagina, the slang meaning of douchebag is an obnoxious, offensive, or disgusting person. And now the people of Reddit are sharing how to spot one right away.

Person holding a blue enema bulb near their abdomen while wearing gray sweatpants
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1."They decide whether or not a shitty comment they made was 'just a joke' based on people's reaction."

u/GraceHollyMoon

2."They lack self awareness and have the inability to sympathize with others."

u/Kreed76

3."Everything is a competition. You had a long day, and you’re tired? Well, their day was harder, and they’re MORE tired."

u/dbatcjuli

Rubber bulb syringe with a nozzle, placed on a wooden surface
Tatyana Azarova / Getty Images

4."Where they put their shopping cart in the parking lot, how they treat lower intelligence animals like bugs/fish, and how they talk to people they are mad at."

u/Ilovefuturama89

5."The amount of weird, 'tough guy' window stickers on the back window of their vehicle."

u/Cheetodude625

"Knockoff Calvin peeing on another knockoff Calvin."

u/ForgettableUsername

6."If they’re the 'never in the wrong' kinda person. I don’t mean someone that has an inability to admit they’re incorrect (which is also douchey), but the kind of person — even when caught dead-to-rights — will find a way to claim no wrongdoing. I once caught a college roommate going through a care package my mother had sent me (happily eating the baked goods, perusing the clothing she’d sent), and I was like, 'Dude! What the FUCK?!' He goes, 'I thought you said I could have some!' I’d received the package a day earlier when he wasn’t even around and had put it under my bed while STILL SEALED. Yet he thought that 'I thought you said I could have some' shit would work. He even told me to 'chill the fuck out' when I got righteously angry. So glad that jackass flunked out in the first semester."

—Anonymous

Hands beside a green bulb syringe and a clear plastic container with a red lid, placed on a light surface
Stockman20 / Getty Images

7."In a conversation, if they often use phrases like, 'Not to brag, but...' And/or are constantly making empty threats."

u/what_do_you_want_now

8."How they treat anyone performing any service for them. Servers, taxi drivers, etc."

u/cestmoi228

"So true. My wife’s father gave her advice as a young girl that I always thought summed it up well: 'If he is nice to you but not nice to the waitress. he is not a nice person.'"

u/UPdrafter906

9."Poor listening skills, and if they're intent on making you do something you don't want."

u/swishswishbish42

Open brown burlap case with zipper, showing empty interior and side loop. It's designed for storing small items
Naropano / Getty Images

10."They go out on a Saturday night, and if they’re not getting laid, then they’re fighting someone."

u/endofthehold

11."I walk with a cane because of nerve damage in my legs. One day, I was walking and tripped and fell to the ground. I hurt myself pretty good on the fall. But, as I was falling, me and this guy locked eyes as I was heading face first to the pavement. I hit the ground hard, and he just stepped over me and went on like I wasn't in need of help. (I live in the US if anyone was wondering.) I consider that to be a douche move, and that guy will forever be a douchebag in my mind."

u/Sinicalkush

12."Nothing is ever their fault; it's always someone else's. If you run into an asshole in the morning, you run into an asshole. You run into assholes all day, then you're the asshole."

u/dennis519

Turquoise rubber bulb syringe with a narrow nozzle, often used for medical or cleaning purposes
Tarzhanova / Getty Images

13."They make fun of people for no reason."

u/torontoballer2000

14."They have to be the center of attention, whether it is small or big occasions. They do this by being obnoxiously loud, showing off, etc. The second would be they act differently around various people to once again show off."

u/Ninety-five19

15.And, finally: "If they ever start any sentence with, 'A real man should...'"

u/Sarato88

Alright, what makes a douchebag, in your opinion? Let us know in the comments!