Piles of poo, hissing cockroaches: Harmless ways to get back at your ex on Valentine's Day
It's that time of the year. Zoos around the country are gearing up to help lovers "honor" exes who did them dirty this Valentine's Day.
The Fort Worth Zoo in Texas for example, is holding a special "excre-vent" this year. Make a $10 donation to the zoo's Doo Some Good campaign and the zoo will dedicate a pound of poo in the name of an "honoree" of your choice. The zoo works with a third-party company to dispose of all excrement, transforming it into compost. Each donation comes with a special certificate, shared via email.
Want to learn more? Here are several other zoos and animal sanctuaries offering yucky, smelly and slimy ways for folks to remember their exes this Valentine's Day.
Cry Me a Cockroach with San Antonio Zoo
The San Antonio Zoo in Texas allows folks to commemorate exes by naming a critter that will be fed to a zoo animal as a tasty treat.
Make a donation to the zoo's Cry Me a Cockroach fundraiser and the zoo will name a cockroach, rodent or vegetable after an ex before serving it to one of the zoo's residents. Cockroaches are $10, pre-frozen rodents are $25 and vegetables are $5. Donors receive a downloadable Valentine's Day card and a special video with one of the zoo's residents.
To learn more or make a tasty donation, visit sazoo.org/crymeacockroach. Donors must be 18 years or older to participate.
Name a cockroach with Brookfield Zoo Chicago
Cockroaches appear to be a popular way to remember one's ex this Valentine's Day.
Make a $15 donation to the Brookfield Zoo Chicago Name a Cockroach campaign and the zoo will name a cockroach after a special (or not so special) somebody before feeding it to a resident animal. Donors receive a digital certificate of naming.
To learn more about the hissing payback, visit brookfieldzoo.org/Cockroach.
Catch and release with Lehigh Valley Zoo
Lehigh Valley Zoo in Schnecksville, Pennsylvania wants to help turn heartbreak into "fin'tastic feasts" this Valentine's Day.
Make a donation of $15 to the Lehigh Valley Zoo Catch and Release campaign and the zoo will name a fish after an ex that will be fed to a resident African penguin. Donors receive a video of a penguin eating the named fish.
To learn more about the fishy donation, visit lvzoo.org/catching-release.
Dating or dumping with Memphis Zoo
Does an ex deserve a stinkin' surprise? The Memphis Zoo in Memphis, Tennessee is looking to help.
Make a $10 donation to the Memphis Zoo Dating or Dumping campaign and choose to receive a digital thank-you card and a video of a red panda munching on a grape or a digital thank-you card and a video of a resident elephant taking a poo. At the end of the campaign, the zoo will share the most popular names.
To learn more, visit here.
Name a superworm with Columbus Zoo
Prefer a different type of creepy critter? The Columbus Zoo and Aquarium in Powell, Ohio will name a superworm after an ex.
Make a $15 donation and the zoo will name a superworm after an ex that will then be fed to the zoo's sloth bears, Randhir and Heiderose. Folks who make a donation before Feb. 12 will receive a special Valentine's Day video of the bears in action.
To learn more about the slithery, slimy donation, visit here.
The zoo is also offering Penguin-tines. A short, personalized video will include a penguin pair at the zoo getting a paper Valentine's Day heart that they can then add to their nest. Penguin-tines cost $65. Orders must be placed by Feb. 9 and can be done here.
Name a roach at the Bronx Zoo
New York's Bronx Zoo's Valentine's Day offerings come with merch.
Make a $15 donation to the Bronx Zoo's Name a Roach fundraiser and the zoo will name a Madagascar hissing cockroach after an ex. Donors receive a digital certificate to honor their not-so-loved one.
But that's not all. Here are the other V-Day donation levels the zoo offers:
Roach Beanie ($35): Downloadable certificate and roach beanie
Roach Belt Bag ($40): Downloadable certificate and roach fanny pack
The Works Gift Package ($85): Downloadable certificate, roach beanie, roach fanny pack and roach plush toy
Virtual Encounter ($35): Downloadable certificate and one-on-one 15-minute live chat with a zoo staff member, cockroach and special animal guest (offers Feb. 14, Feb. 15 and Feb. 16)
The deadline to receive items aside from the digital certificate by Valentine's Day has passed.
To learn more, visit bronxzoo.com/roach.
My Bloody Valentine at WildCat Ridge Sanctuary
How much is an ex's heart worth? The WildCat Ridge Sanctuary in Scotts Mills, Oregon is looking to find out.
Make a $50 donation to the WildCat Ridge Sanctuary's My Bloody Valentine fundraiser before Feb. 10 or a $75 donation after and the sanctuary will feed an ex's "heart" (meat and Jell-O mold) to a resident wildcat.
Learn more about the bloody donation at wildcatridgesanctuary.org/my-bloody-valentine-2025.
Name a bug with the Minnesota Zoo Foundation
Jumping on the bug train, the Minnesota Zoo Foundation in Apple Valley, Minnesota is naming critters after exes.
Make a $15 donation to the Minnesota Zoo Foundation's Name a Bug campaign and the zoo will name a bug in someone's honor to help feed a resident animal. Donors receive a digital thank-you card.
To learn more, visit mnzoofoundation.org/bug.
Quit bugging me with El Paso Zoo
The El Paso Zoo in El Paso, Texas is once again naming Madagascar hissing cockroaches after exes.
Donations are not required but a $5 donation to the Paso Del Norte Community Foundation is encouraged. For each submission, the zoo will name a Madagascar hissing cockroach in an ex's honor. They will then be fed to a resident meerkat. The El Paso Zoo will be hosting a livestream of the meerkats enjoying the bugs at 2:15 p.m. local time on Feb. 14 on Facebook and Instagram.
Learn more about the bugged-out donation, visit here.
Greta Cross is a national trending reporter at USA TODAY. Follow her on X and Instagram @gretalcross. Story idea? Email her at gcross@usatoday.com.
This article originally appeared on USA TODAY: Piles of poo, roaches: Harmless ways to get Valentine's Day revenge
