What to Read Next

Should You Wait to Get Engaged?

Casey Gueren
August 27, 2012


Avril Lavigne
Avril Lavigne

Meeting, getting engaged, and tying the knot faster than a season of Gossip Girl sounds so passionate and romantic. But rushing to the altar isn't such a smart move. In fact, experts agree that you should wait at least a year to make sure you and your guy are really a match-for a few simple, common-sense reasons:



You need more than a few months to see your worst sides.

It can takes a good six months or so to remove the love-colored glasses and begin to really see the other person, flaws and all. That's because the longer you steadily date, the more you get out of your comfort zones and settle into a routine-and that's when your true personalities emerge. Is he lazy about doing household chores? Is he disrespectful to your family and friends? Experiencing different scenarios together can help size up whether you two are right for each other, says Linda Miles, PhD, author of The New Marriage.


Related: 6 Ways to Train Your Boyfriend


You need time for the early-stage dopamine haze to clear.

This is the brain chemical that's responsible for triggering that head-over-heels feeling when you first get together. Dopamine makes us feel overly positive, which can mask the fact that maybe your union doesn't have long-term legs, says Miles. That high usually starts to wear off in six months to a year, and those behaviors you thought you could live with or were even cute and quirky-for example, his forgetfulness or penchant for being 10 minutes late for everything-suddenly become super annoying potential deal breakers.

It takes time to find out if your future plans sync up.

Before you can determine if your love will go the distance, you need enough time to go by to make sure you have similar outlooks on handling money, whether you want kids, where you want to live, and other crucial thoughts about the future. "To sustain a relationship, couples have to share common goals, values, and interests along with sexual attraction and emotional maturity," says Christine Meinecke, PhD, author of Everybody Marries the Wrong Person.

Related: In Praise of the 29-Year Old Bride

We're not saying that marriage can never work for couples who tie the knot sooner than a year-but if you can put time on your side, what's the rush?

After all, if he's really The One, then even after one year, he still will be. Now that you know the ideal amount of time to be dating before you get married, check out what experts say is the best age to get married.


Read more at Cosmopolitan.com!


How Not to Marry the Wrong Guy

5 Women Who Almost Ruined Their Proposals

The Marriage Mistake Hollywood Women Make

12 Famous Women Who Have Been Cheated On


Become a fan of Cosmo on Facebook and follow us on Twitter!



Want More Sex & Love Advice? Subscribe to Cosmo & Save Up to 77%!

VA Mortgage Rates In 2016

VA Rates as Low as 2.75% (3.028% APR) 15 Year Fixed. Exclusive For Veteran & Military Takes 1 Min!

Company Gives Homeowners a Break From Repair Bills

One company protects millions of homeowners across the US from many expensive repair bills for just pennies a day.

Last Minute Trip to Las Vegas?

Need to get away? Plan your last minute trip to Las Vegas with trivago. Compare rates and find your perfect hotel!

Find Out Anything About Anyone. Enter Any Name.

A new site has made it easy to find out the truth about the people you already know and people you meet! Simply type in a name and select a state!

Replace your lash curler W/ Plumpify Mascara!

The new Plumpify Mascara formula helps build 50X volume & lash separation. Get a vertical eyelash lift with no smudging from our biggest brush ever!

Free Real Estate Event in NYC Feb. 2-6!

Join us for Than Merrill's, the star of A&E's 'Flip this House', free 2 hour training event in the New York City area. Register before seats are gone!

Live Steps from Eisenhower Metro — Now Pre-Leasing

Luxe apartment living that blends the best of city living and the beautiful outdoors, with a rooftop pool and lounge, dog grooming station and more.

How Older Men Tighten Their Skin

Men, reduce the look of wrinkles, sagging skin and fine lines with this affordable and effective skin tightening treatment without leaving your home.

Banks Are Worried Homeowners Will Do This.

Homeowners are surprised and furious. If you owe less than $625,000 on your home, you better read this.

Credit Cards Now Offer 0% Intro APR Through 2017

Credit card companies are now offering 0% intro APR for 21 months for all purchases and balance transfers or 40k bonus miles ($400 bonus) and 2x miles

Powerful Tactical Flashlight Flying Off Shelves!

This new tactical flashlight was just released to the public and is flying off shelves in the United States. Limited supplies left, act quick!

Looking for Internet, Phone & Cable Services?

Comcast Business Offers Services to Help Your Business Grow! Bundle Internet + Phone + Cable Starting at $94.85/mo!

Walden University - For Working Professionals

Pursue Your Advanced Degree Without Leaving The Workforce. Classes Start Soon. Request Free Information!

Silversea - The Ultimate Luxury Cruise Vacation

Enjoy gourmet cuisine, premium beverages, butler service & more - it's all included on Silversea's intimate, luxury cruises to all 7 continents.