Woman Called ‘Selfish’ by Her Father for Turning Her Guest Room Into Home Office

A new mom is questioning whether she made the right choice when she converted her guest bedroom into a home office, after her dad called her "selfish" for suggesting he sleep on a mattress in the room.

In a post shared on Reddit's Am I the A------? forum on Saturday, Dec. 14, a woman who gave birth to her first child in October spoke about her and her husband's housing arrangement in their three-bedroom apartment.

"We sleep in the master bedroom, and until earlier this year, the other two were a guest room and an office space we both shared," she wrote, adding that the pair decided to turn the guest room into a nursery once her son was born.

According to the woman, she works in person from an office but also does some freelancing from home on occasion, and her husband has a hybrid work arrangement.

"We thought about sacrificing the office instead, but decided we needed it more than the guest room," she continued. "We don’t need to do our work from the office, but it’s more comfortable and less chaotic, especially now that we have a baby. On the other hand, we rarely have guests over. If we do, the office is big enough to set a mattress (edit: a normal one, not an air mattress) on the floor."

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This is where the woman's dilemma comes in. Her father, who lives in another country, planned to visit for one week around Christmas. The trip marks the first time he will meet his grandson, and the woman noted that he previously stayed in their guest room.

"A couple weeks ago, my father called to ask whether he could stay at my apartment again this year. I said sure, but we don’t have the guest room anymore, so he’d have to sleep in the office. He asked what I meant, and I told him we’d turned the guest room into the baby’s nursery," she wrote.

She said her dad became irritated and asked why the couple hadn't kept the guest room and sacrificed the office for the nursery.

"My father got annoyed and said, 'Whatever, I’ll get a hotel,' before hanging up on me," she revealed. "The next day, my father texted me. He said it was selfish and inconsiderate of me and my husband to keep an office we 'don’t actually need' over a room to properly house potential guests."

"He added that he didn’t raise me to be such an awful hostess, and it’s insane of me to think people would be okay sleeping on a mattress on the floor. My sister is siding with my father, and I’m starting to doubt myself here," she added, asking the Reddit community to weigh in on whether she was in the wrong.

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Almost unanimously, the post's commenters concluded that the woman was "not the a------" in the situation, and that her father should respect that the couple needs some extra space for themselves.

"A home should be set up for the best interests of the people who live there. You and your husband both regularly work from home," one commenter wrote. "Sure, you could make do without the office, but it would be awkward and inconvenient for you both."

"It’s quite absurd for someone who isn’t paying any part of the rent or living there to expect you to suffer routine inconvenience in your own home year round to better be convenient for them a few days a year," they added.

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Adding some additional clarification, the original poster shared that her sister still lives with their mom, about 15 minutes away, and has said that she would be okay with sleeping on the office mattress.

"[Housing] a guest temporarily vs. every day to day life?" one reply questioned. "He’s rude for being so demanding on your space, especially after just having a baby. He will be more comfortable in hotel considering how 'disruptive' a baby can be."

"Honestly, I sometimes think it's so wasteful to keep a full room just on the premise that someone MIGHT come over to stay," another person chimed in. "I'm all for hybrid rooms. Office with a built-in Murphy Bed on the wall. Project room with a pull-out couch, exercise home gym with an air mattress."

"[Why] take your limited space and have it dedicated solely to something that might not be used for months on end?" they added.

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