16 Dating Safety Tips From Women That Are Honestly So Helpful
Recently, I asked the women of the BuzzFeed Community to share what safety tips they have when it comes to dating. Here are some of their responses:
1."NEVER give your date your real number. If I feel like texting them, I'll give them a Google Voice number or a texting app number. If they creep me out at any point, I can block them or get a new texting number and feel safe they can never contact me again."
—Anonymous, 30, Oregon
2."I now always avoid suggesting places that I go to frequently for the first couple of dates. I had a bad first date at one of my favorite coffee places, and then the guy showed up there two times after that date, possibly to see if I was around. My friend worked there and told me about it."
3."Don't go to their house or invite them to your home on the first date. Don't let them pick you up from your house either — you never know about people stalking you, so keep them at a safe distance until you can get to know them."
4."Share your location, screenshots of their name, their number, and a photo of them with someone you trust. Do not tell them your last name or where you live on a first date. I've been on some really horrible dates and situations."
5."Do not drink anything if you haven’t literally had your eye on your drink from start to finish. Even something that seems so nice, like him leaving your table to 'go to the bar to get your drink because it’ll be quicker' is a no-no. It’d be easy to drop something in that drink on the way back. Might seem overly paranoid, but we've learned by now that you should not trust anyone you’re not thoroughly acquainted with."
6."I always go on the same first date: breakfast at the local family restaurant. It isn't dark outside, breakfast is the lowest key meal, and there is always a group of regulars there that have nothing better to do than people watch. Plus, it's breakfast, so if it doesn't go well, it is easy to get out of the date because people usually have other stuff going on during the day."
—Anonymous, 28, Wisconsin
7."ALWAYS drive yourself. I’ve had too many dates where the boy picked me up, and then I was stuck there. If the date is going poorly or you’re uncomfortable, you always want to have a way to leave quickly. Or, conversely — if you don’t drive — have a friend on standby that can come pick you up if you text them."
—Anonymous
8."If your date appears to be standing you up and a 'nice person' just happens to be nearby and wants to 'save your night' or strikes up a conversation about being stood up, never fall for it. Some people do this so they appear to be the good guy even if they aren’t, and some do this to make it easier to play on your emotions. Get out of there."
9."Look up the phone number for the place you're going and save it in your phone beforehand. If your date is extra sketchy and you're not comfortable trying to flag down a staff member in front of them, you can go to the bathroom and call from there for assistance."
10."Don't be pressured to be polite. I learned the hard way when I was younger. It's an expectation predators use against women a lot. If something doesn't feel right, just leave. It's better to be rude and alive, than polite and dead. It's good to have an excuse prepared and a friend who knows where you are and can pull you out if needed, but ultimately the most important thing is to just physically get away from the date."
11."Use 'Ask for Angela' if you feel unsafe."
12."I have a recording of a guy friend pretending to be my dad having a conversation with me on the phone. I play it when I feel unsafe in a car like Uber or any other uncomfortable dating situation so the other person 'knows' I have someone expecting me. It plays a ringtone three times and has pauses in between for me to respond to sound as realistic as possible."
13."I recently saw a TikTok where a girl explained that, if you live in an apartment complex and feel like someone is following you home, you shouldn't turn the lights on right away when you get inside. If you do, it can tip them off as to which exact unit you live in, because that window will suddenly light up. Instead, wait a little bit, and then turn it on. This definitely applies to having a date you don't know too well drop you off/pick you up at home, or if you feel like they might've followed you back."
—Anonymous
14."I would recommend any woman to read The Gift of Fear by Gavin de Becker. It’s a great book. It shows how you can protect yourself and the importance of building awareness and trusting your instincts."
15."Self-defense is really important. Just learning a few kicks can save lives."
16.And finally, "The hottest thing I do for my safety is...I don’t date 🤣."
Do you have any other safety tips for women who are dating? Share them in the comments below!
Some submissions have been edited for length and/or clarity.
A little serial dating never kills anyone. Check out the trailer for F Marry Kill, starring Lucy Hale and Virginia Gardner. The film is in select theaters and on digital December 6.
