People Revealed Why Sex Fizzled Out With Their Partners, And It's Very Eye-Opening

Recently Reddit user itsjadejuniper asked the community, "What made you lose attraction to your ex-partner?"

Matthew Perry and Lisa Kudrow in "Friends"
NBC

Welp, folks didn't hold anything back, and revealed the significant things their partners did that turned them off sexually. For them, there was no turning back.

Emily Hampshire in "Schitt's Creek"
CBC / Pop

So, here are some bigggggg relationship turn-offs that made folks lose sexual interest in their partners:

1."When they started treating everyone else better than me. I felt like I was just an afterthought, and that completely killed the attraction."

u/CandyCloud_9

"It kind of hits hard when you realize the person you cared for prioritized others over you. It’s like, why am I even here if I’m not valued? It definitely changes how you feel about them over time."

u/leavesmeplease

2."When they began arguing for the sake of it. No rhyme or reason or well-thought-out ideas. Just blindly disagreed with everything to anger me, and then she’d say, 'Whatever' when I punched holes in her dumb arguments."

u/Old_Bodybuilder_3320

A man and woman sit on a couch having an intense conversation, gesturing with their hands, appearing to be in a disagreement
Fizkes / Getty Images/iStockphoto

3."My ex emotionally dumped all her issues on me. After a long time of being her personal therapist, I began to feel a duty to be there for her for all her emotional turmoil. To protect her and help her better herself with advice and support. But that dynamic skewed the relationship, and my drive for sex slowly diminished until it was gone completely. It was a harsh lesson to learn that you can be there for your partner, but even if you want to, you can’t be everything for them."

u/rolendd

4."I stopped wanting to have sex with him because I felt so objectified. His affection towards me was ONLY tied to sex. Once I stopped, he started being sexual and 'pushy' with every single other woman, irrespective of looks, personality, or morals. I walked out of that relationship thinking I was asexual."

u/the__laurapalmer

A person in a suit gently pulls down the strap of another person's elegant dress, creating an intimate moment
Monstarrr_ / Getty Images/iStockphoto

5."She was always so down on herself, and it got kind of insulting because no matter what I said, it was brushed off. Then she got upset because I stopped complimenting her. She basically convinced me I wasn't attracted to her, and I just got so tired of it. I found myself saying, 'Okay, you have convinced me.' We broke up, and it wasn't bad, but it was for the best. I still want the best for her."

u/Ak_Lonewolf

6."After my cat died, my ex was suddenly grieving for his dogs that died over three years ago. I needed to accept he couldn't be supportive of me in my grief, and I needed to give him sympathy instead. I realized he didn't actually love or care for me, just the attention he got from me. Pictures of him make my skin crawl now."

u/Full_Bag8293

7."'Future faking.' He promised forever, only for me to find out that he was never serious about it and was still sleeping with other women."

u/Erred404

A couple embraces intimately on a bed, covered partially by a white sheet, with a cityscape visible through the window behind them
Lwa / Getty Images

8."When my ex stopped putting effort into the relationship and became complacent. It felt like they were taking me for granted, and that really made me lose attraction over time."

u/anaxray

9."When I paid all the bills for two years. He seemed to think he was above 'menial jobs' because he was 'making his art' (he completed nothing, despite all of my financial support). Clearly, he was not above being kept by his girlfriend despite my tears and pleading as I was drowning and working to burnout to keep both of us afloat. I also found out he had a six-month affair with a vulnerable 18-year-old during that time, but I only found out after I dumped him (we were in our early thirties). He was an entitled asshole."

u/lfreyn

10."She always talked about herself and never asked me anything or what was going on in my life. It was really hard even to have a conversation about things or get feedback. It was like I was single and felt like I never got any feedback. I'm in a much better place now."

u/Redsoutherman917

Man and woman talking on a couch
Bernardbodo / Getty Images/iStockphoto

11."I started losing attraction when they became really negative all the time (like, constantly complaining and being critical of everything). It just drained the fun out of being together and made me realize we weren't on the same page anymore."

u/mayaloveu

12."Honestly, I saw a lot of my stepmother (who I loathe) in her. I always asked myself how did I end up in the same situation my father was in — I'm happy I got out of that one."

u/Jhon_doe_smokes

13."She didn't have a job, and I'd come home from work every day to dirty dishes and clothes all over the floor of her room. She would be lying there disconnected from me on her phone, leaving me to clean everything and take care of her kid. She never wanted to go anywhere or do anything with me — just always wanted me to pay for her shit and do everything for her."

u/Jimehhhhhhh

Person relaxing on a couch while reading their phone in a cozy and modern living room with plants and ambient lighting
Anchiy / Getty Images

14."He let his family disrespect me and be so mean to me for years to the point where I'd get butterflies before any family gathering."

u/maoruiwen

15."When I realized they were a chronic people pleaser. 90% of what they told me was a lie to just get me to like them. The worst part is it warped my understanding of what a relationship is, and it took a while to get over that feeling that someone isn't right for me because we have different interests. To this day, I have no idea who I dated for four years of my life. It was all make-believe."

u/beartheminus

16."When I found out my ex-husband cheated on me with his best friend's girlfriend. He immediately went from being someone I loved to the point of my own destruction to someone who made my skin crawl and I couldn't look at."

u/iggypurple

A woman in a short dress with long curly hair romantically embraces a man in a suit as she sits on a table
Andrii Lysenko / Getty Images

17."She was fake. She could go from yelling loudly in the car to pulling up somewhere and throwing a smile on her face. She could have a completely bubbly attitude in a matter of seconds."

u/Dubbind

18."She had a very permissive and unaccountable way of looking at life, and I believe that structure should be a fundamental part of building a strong enough relationship if you want to start a family. Inevitably, this would become a problem if we progressed further (I still care for her as a person very much)."

u/Particular_Ad_7663

19.And finally, "He lacked emotional intelligence. He was a doctor on a mission to prove himself to be well-educated and intelligent, but oh dear me! That man did not know how to comprehend matters of the heart and mind. It was draining."

u/Nya_Chewa

A man, visibly upset, points his finger while speaking to a woman sitting on a couch with her head in her hand, appearing distressed
Fizkes / Getty Images/iStockphoto

Note: Some submissions were edited for length and/or clarity.