4 Ways to Teach Your Child Calmness
Mindfulness is having a moment: Experts say the practice of being fully aware of your thoughts and feelings in a nonjudgmental way can help reduce stress responses, improve cognition or focus, fight pain, and more. Kids can benefit from it too. Meditation is the most studied form of mindfulness, but there are plenty of other ways to embrace the practice with your family, says Lara Fielding, Psy.D., Ed.M., a clinical psychologist and the author of Mastering Adulthood.
Make It a Game
Introduce the concept of mindfulness by working it into family activities. For example, “go on a hike together and hunt for certain colors or plants, pay attention to your footsteps, or see how quietly everyone can walk for a few minutes,” suggests Jill Emanuele, Ph.D., senior director of the Mood Disorders Center at the Child Mind Institute. Another option: Try mindful eating. For a couple of minutes during dinner or dessert, engage all five senses and focus on how your food looks, smells, tastes, and feels in your mouth.
Do Some Belly Breathing
To help your family settle down and reconnect during cranky moments, invite everyone to do this: Put one hand on your stomach and the other on your heart. When you inhale, let your belly expand. Exhale longer than you inhaled. Try breathing in for five seconds and exhaling for seven, or inhaling for three seconds and exhaling for five. The pace will vary for each person — find your own rhythm, says Fielding. This type of breathing calms the nervous system and lowers the stress response. “It also makes everyone shift attention away from whatever they were distracted or upset by before,” says Fielding.
Try a Guided Meditation
“If your kids are ready for a more formal meditation, one idea is to engage them where they usually are, which is on their phones,” says Emanuele. She suggests downloading an app or finding a video on YouTube with a short (one- to two-minute) meditation. WD’s suggestion: The meditation app Stop Breathe & Think (iOS and Android), which earned a Woman’s Day Great Value Award last year, has a version for kids ages 5 to 10 as well as one for teens and adults.
Let Kids Be Emotional
Sometimes when you pause to focus on your thoughts, you realize you don’t feel so great — and that’s OK for kids too. “Parents often try to rescue kids from their feelings rather than validate those feelings,” says Fielding. Let children know they don’t have to hide it when they feel crummy and that being aware of all emotions is a form of mindfulness.
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