When did prom become a mean girl experience? A viral TikTok sheds light on bullying over a dress
A high school prom dress should symbolize joy, confidence, and self-expression—but for one Illinois teen, it turned into a nightmare of bullying and harassment. In a now-viral TikTok, Kathy Labedzki-Pierga, owner of Kasia’s Bridal and Special Occasion boutique, shared an alarming story about a girl who faced relentless bullying simply for purchasing a purple sparkly gown. And the story about it, has been told in a viral TikTok video, has now 7.6m video views.
Labedzki-Pierga revealed that after the teen posted a picture of her newly bought dress on a school Facebook page dedicated to preventing duplicate prom looks, another student—who had admired but never purchased the same gown—became outraged. But it wasn’t just high school drama; the other girl’s mother escalated the situation by repeatedly calling the boutique, demanding the dress be returned, and even threatening to involve her husband.
“You need to take that dress back from that girl because my daughter wanted that dress,” the mother insisted. When Labedzki-Pierga refused, the situation spiraled. The girl who had purchased the dress became a target for bullying, with reports that her car and house had been egged.
“I’m afraid for this girl’s life at this point because I heard that they already managed to egg her car and her house,” Labedzki-Pierga said in her video. “You guys, get real. It’s not that serious.”
While the incident sparked outrage and an outpouring of support for the bullied teen, it also raised an important question: Why is the mean girl culture still thriving, and what can parents do to stop it?
Related: Mom says her tween daughter is bullying other kids over their clothes—so she’s asking for advice
Raising includers, not mean girls
The viral prom dress controversy highlights the urgent need to raise girls who lift each other up rather than tear each other down. As Labedzki-Pierga put it, “If adults are bullying adults, then why are we surprised that this is happening in high school?”
At Motherly, we believe in fostering kindness and inclusivity among girls, and research shows that parents play a key role in this. In the article “Raising Girls Who Are Includers Instead of Mean Girls,” Motherly provides practical strategies for nurturing empathy and kindness in children. Here are a few takeaways:
Model Inclusivity: Children absorb behaviors from the adults in their lives. If parents gossip, exclude, or react with hostility, their children are likely to mirror those actions. Instead, demonstrate kindness by embracing diversity in your own friendships and social circles.
Encourage Empathy: Help your child step into someone else’s shoes by asking questions like, How do you think she felt when that happened? This fosters emotional intelligence and helps kids recognize the impact of their actions.
Praise Kindness, Not Just Achievement: Shift the focus from external success (like being the best athlete or the most popular student) to internal values like being a good friend and standing up for others.
Teach Assertiveness, Not Aggression: There’s a difference between standing up for oneself and putting others down. Encourage your child to communicate their feelings and needs while respecting others.
Help Them Recognize Toxic Behavior: Sometimes, girls go along with mean behavior out of fear of becoming the next target. Teach them to identify exclusionary actions and have the courage to say, That’s not okay.
Create a Culture of Inclusion: Encourage playdates, group activities, and events that bring together different social groups. When children learn to mix with diverse peers early, they are more likely to value inclusivity later.
As parents, teachers, and role models, we have the power to shape the next generation of girls into confident, supportive leaders. The viral prom dress incident is a heartbreaking reminder of why we must actively fight against mean girl culture. It starts at home, with the values we instill in our children every day.
Related: Why this dad refused to punish his son for bullying—and what he did instead
Let’s raise girls who know that confidence isn’t about putting others down—it’s about lifting everyone up.
