The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week (Aug. 24-30)
Kids may say the darndest things, but parentstweet about them in the funniest ways. Although Twitter has rebranded to X, the humor lives on.
Every week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on the social media platform to spread the joy. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents for more!
Ordered new coats for my kids and for convenience I had them shipped directly to their school’s lost and found section
— Vinod Chhaproo (@Chhapiness) August 28, 2024
Ordered new coats for my kids and for convenience I had them shipped directly to their school’s lost and found section
— Vinod Chhaproo (@Chhapiness) August 28, 2024 ">
It's School Picture day, also known as "I can't believe we paid $96 for these."
— Rodney Lacroix (@RodLacroix) August 28, 2024
It's School Picture day, also known as "I can't believe we paid $96 for these."
— Rodney Lacroix (@RodLacroix) August 28, 2024 ">
My 4yo screamed at the top of his lungs at 6:45am this morning, we are staying at my in laws, so I said “I’m not sure everyone likes it when you scream like that.” Then, from the other side of the room, my 18mo who last week could barely say 10 words, “Winnie like it”
— Lucy Huber (@clhubes) August 28, 2024
My 4yo screamed at the top of his lungs at 6:45am this morning, we are staying at my in laws, so I said “I’m not sure everyone likes it when you scream like that.” Then, from the other side of the room, my 18mo who last week could barely say 10 words, “Winnie like it”
— Lucy Huber (@clhubes) August 28, 2024 ">
My 6yo just learned the word 𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘵, and he is not afraid to use it
— meghan (@deloisivete) August 27, 2024
My 6yo just learned the word 𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘵, and he is not afraid to use it
— meghan (@deloisivete) August 27, 2024 ">
There should be a product swap booth on the way into Costco, you can bring the massive package of snacks that your kid used to like and exchange it for the huge box of snacks that some other kid has rejected
— Real Life Mommy (@reallifemommy3) August 29, 2024
There should be a product swap booth on the way into Costco, you can bring the massive package of snacks that your kid used to like and exchange it for the huge box of snacks that some other kid has rejected
— Real Life Mommy (@reallifemommy3) August 29, 2024 ">
“Since we just did something you wanted to do, can we do something we want to do now?” - my 6 year old daughter as we exited the circus
— Henpecked Hal (@HenpeckedHal) August 25, 2024
“Since we just did something you wanted to do, can we do something we want to do now?” - my 6 year old daughter as we exited the circus
— Henpecked Hal (@HenpeckedHal) August 25, 2024 ">
3 yr old: “At my next birthday will I go back to normal? Will I get littler again?”
Me: “no honey. Each birthday you get bigger. You’ll continue to grow. Isn’t that cool?!”
3 yr old: starts sobbing.— Molly Wadzeck Kraus (@MWadzeckKraus) August 25, 2024
3 yr old: “At my next birthday will I go back to normal? Will I get littler again?”
Me: “no honey. Each birthday you get bigger. You’ll continue to grow. Isn’t that cool?!”
3 yr old: starts sobbing.
— Molly Wadzeck Kraus (@MWadzeckKraus) August 25, 2024 ">
Me: “no honey. Each birthday you get bigger. You’ll continue to grow. Isn’t that cool?!”
3 yr old: starts sobbing.
Marked safe from taking my kids grocery shopping on a Saturday afternoon.
— Jennifer Parker (@Mrs_JParker) August 24, 2024
Marked safe from taking my kids grocery shopping on a Saturday afternoon.
— Jennifer Parker (@Mrs_JParker) August 24, 2024 ">
For the first half of my life, I thought you could only poop at home. Now I know you can poop anywhere
- my 5yo, unprompted— Average Dad (@Average_Dad1) August 26, 2024
For the first half of my life, I thought you could only poop at home. Now I know you can poop anywhere
- my 5yo, unprompted
— Average Dad (@Average_Dad1) August 26, 2024 ">
- my 5yo, unprompted
Me: *Stops buying bagels after noticing my kid hasn’t been eating the ones I’ve been buying for weeks*
My kid that week: Can I have a bagel?— SpacedMom (@copymama) August 26, 2024
Me: *Stops buying bagels after noticing my kid hasn’t been eating the ones I’ve been buying for weeks*
My kid that week: Can I have a bagel?
— SpacedMom (@copymama) August 26, 2024 ">
My kid that week: Can I have a bagel?
My kid’s teacher gave her a packet of loose confetti that she’s supposed to put under her pillow during the first week of school, and I don’t understand why her teacher already hates me so much
— Real Life Mommy (@reallifemommy3) August 27, 2024
My kid’s teacher gave her a packet of loose confetti that she’s supposed to put under her pillow during the first week of school, and I don’t understand why her teacher already hates me so much
— Real Life Mommy (@reallifemommy3) August 27, 2024 ">
My teen has informed us that when she has kids, she’s going to limit screen time, take them hiking, teach them how to raise chickens and milk cows, demonstrate the value of work.
This is the same kid who won’t take her shoes upstairs— McDad (@mcdadstuff) August 27, 2024
My teen has informed us that when she has kids, she’s going to limit screen time, take them hiking, teach them how to raise chickens and milk cows, demonstrate the value of work.
This is the same kid who won’t take her shoes upstairs
— McDad (@mcdadstuff) August 27, 2024 ">
This is the same kid who won’t take her shoes upstairs
My kids acting shocked there’s ants in my car like they’re not Hansel and Gretel leaving fuckin crumb trails.
— @itssherifield (@itssherifield) August 28, 2024
My kids acting shocked there’s ants in my car like they’re not Hansel and Gretel leaving fuckin crumb trails.
— @itssherifield (@itssherifield) August 28, 2024 ">
8: mom i look like one of those nut crusher guys
narrator: and from that day forth that’s what the family referred to nut crackers as— That Mom Tho (@mom_tho) August 25, 2024
8: mom i look like one of those nut crusher guys
narrator: and from that day forth that’s what the family referred to nut crackers as
— That Mom Tho (@mom_tho) August 25, 2024 ">
narrator: and from that day forth that’s what the family referred to nut crackers as
9 voluntarily turned off YouTube so I had to call 911 because he's obviously experiencing a medical emergency.
— Dadman Walking (@dadmann_walking) August 25, 2024
9 voluntarily turned off YouTube so I had to call 911 because he's obviously experiencing a medical emergency.
— Dadman Walking (@dadmann_walking) August 25, 2024 ">
Adding hostage negotiator to my CV if I have to talk my 6yo down from one more pet idea
— meghan (@deloisivete) August 28, 2024
Adding hostage negotiator to my CV if I have to talk my 6yo down from one more pet idea
— meghan (@deloisivete) August 28, 2024 ">
Just woken up and my 10yr old sees me.
10: You look like you’re drowned.— Late to the party Laura (@ericamorecambe) August 26, 2024
Just woken up and my 10yr old sees me.
10: You look like you’re drowned.
— Late to the party Laura (@ericamorecambe) August 26, 2024 ">
10: You look like you’re drowned.
Hi! Welcome to the new school year. Here’s 75 emails to check 695 forms to fill out and 96 meet ups at extremely inconvenient times that parents with jobs and multiple children cannot attend.
— @itssherifield (@itssherifield) August 27, 2024
Hi! Welcome to the new school year. Here’s 75 emails to check 695 forms to fill out and 96 meet ups at extremely inconvenient times that parents with jobs and multiple children cannot attend.
— @itssherifield (@itssherifield) August 27, 2024 ">
What wine pairs with teaching your kid how to parallel park?
— Rodney Lacroix (@RodLacroix) August 29, 2024
What wine pairs with teaching your kid how to parallel park?
— Rodney Lacroix (@RodLacroix) August 29, 2024 ">
Because I used to hate when I questioned my parents' about something and their response was, "Because I said so," I promised myself I would never say that to my kids when I became a parent.
Turns out, some promises were made to be broken.— Hollie Harris (@allholls) August 27, 2024
Because I used to hate when I questioned my parents' about something and their response was, "Because I said so," I promised myself I would never say that to my kids when I became a parent.
Turns out, some promises were made to be broken.
— Hollie Harris (@allholls) August 27, 2024 ">
Turns out, some promises were made to be broken.
