Missouri rejected these ‘vulgar’ license plates. I’m not sure what to think about it | Opinion
This commentary references profanity and may be offensive to some readers.
When I read The Star’s news story on automobile license plates that were rejected, I was intrigued. My family recently bought a used car, so we are in the market for new plates.
I don’t usually buy what are referred to as vanity plates, but after reading this story, it makes me wonder: Are license plates the last bastion of our individuality? And who is making the call on what’s offensive or vulgar?
From June 2023 to May 2024, the Missouri Department of Revenue rejected 475 unique license plate configurations.
Apparently, the Department of Revenue is able to catch profanities in many languages, and reject license plate applications about the president, drugs or violence.
Obviously, each license plate must follow state obscenity laws. They cannot be “obscene, profane, patently offensive or contemptuous of a racial or ethnic group, or offensive to good taste or decency.”
I’ll be the first person to say you shouldn’t be able to use racial epithets, or calls for violence. I get that. But in a world where more and more people feel constrained and controlled, shouldn’t you just be able to say what you feel on one of the most expensive purchases you make — your vehicle?
The news story published 16 of the 475 rejected plates. Those of you submitting these plate ideas are really clever. Considering you can use only up to six characters plus one space, dash or apostrophe, you guys are downright gifted.
I figured out on my own why a few were rejected (and sorry, I can’t explain here in a general news outlet). If you don’t understand, ask a 20-something:
Anything ending in “AF”
Anything with or alluding to “MOFO”
Anything alluding to the f-word
Anything alluding to the b-word
Anything using the combination of numbers 69
A few of the ones rejected were fascinating – meaning why would someone want to have this on their vehicle? Of the 16 The Star cited, two had to do with cannibalism (“CANABL” and “DAHMER”).
Is this a thing now? Do I have to worry about this?
One, “FB1CAR,” makes sense, I guess. You don’t want drivers out there impersonating the FBI, right?
And “HANKYP”? Which I’m guessing is short for “hanky-panky.” Who is rejecting these plates, the Missouri Department of Revenue, or my grandmother?
The rest — “1ETAS5,” “PFAAF0,” “FCRDF0,” “UFAUF0,” “BEAUCH” and “PNSCAR” — are beyond me. I don’t get why they were rejected. I suppose my mind isn’t that filthy. Don’t email me with your guesses. I don’t think I want to know.
I get a lot of letters from readers who feel like they are not heard (on both political sides, but recently, more from the right.) I’m sure this has contributed to the rise of Trump’s “MAGA.” So again, why can’t we express ourselves fully inside the little box on our vehicles?
But as I’m thinking this through, imagine the increases in road rage we’d experience if you really could say what you want on your plate. So what’s left to say?
Nerddom rise! Those of us who love sci-fi and geeky stuff, unite! There are plenty of you who might not share this interest, but it’s not against the law.
Here are five license plate ideas. You’re welcome.
“D0KTR” (British sci-fi icon Doctor Who)
“JLPCRD” (“Star Trek” Captain Jean- Luc Picard)
“STEMLF” (STEM Life, or Fan of STEM — science, technology, engineering and math)
“VIDGMR” (Video gamer)
“NRDC0R” (Nerdcore, an internet aesthetic and genre of music)
These may already be taken, but I haven’t checked. Remember, there are a lot of us nerds out there, thank goodness.
