Bride Makes 'Gut-Wrenching Decision' to Call Off Wedding After Fiancé Gives Her 'Surprise' Gift That Left Her 'Blindsided'
"My first reaction was one of shock and confusion, as I thought it was a huge decision that we should have discussed together," the bride wrote on Reddit
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A stock image of a man giving a woman a giftA bride-to-be is questioning if she "overreacted" by calling off her wedding after receiving a surprise gift from her fiancé: a fixer-upper home for them to live in
“Now, I get that it can be a great investment, but this particular house needed a ton of work,” she wrote. “I’m talking major renovations and repairs, and I honestly had no desire to live there"
“I had just ruined what was supposed to be a happy night, and I felt horrible,” the OP shared. “Since then, Mark has been trying to reach out, saying he wishes we could talk it over, but I can’t shake the feeling that he disrespected my feelings and my input in our relationship"
A bride-to-be can’t help but wonder if she "overreacted" by calling off her wedding after her fiancé surprised her with a gift that brought their future into question.
The woman, 30, made a post on Reddit's "Am I the A------" forum on Tuesday, Dec. 17, to explain why she made the “gut-wrenching decision” — leading off with a backstory about the couple.
She and her fiancé, Mark, 32, have been together for three years and engaged for about a year, the original poster (OP) explained. “I’ve always known Mark to be a bit unconventional; he’s very creative and sometimes takes things a little too far in the name of surprise or excitement,” she wrote. “Most of the time, I love his adventurous spirit, but this time? Not so much.”
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A stock image of a woman holding keysRelated: Bride Regrets Her Recent Wedding, Can't Bear to Look at Photos: 'Traumatized from It All'
The instance that led to their split occurred weeks earlier when they hosted a gathering of close friends to celebrate their upcoming nuptials and Mark revealed he had a “surprise.” After a few drinks, he unveiled the surprise, which the OP said she “figured would be something sweet, like a heartfelt gift or maybe a romantic gesture.”
“He pulled out what looked like a box from a special jewelry store. My heart raced with excitement as I assumed it was a lovely bracelet or a special memento for our wedding day,” the OP wrote. “But when he opened the box, I was absolutely stunned.”
Inside the box, she found a key to a home that Mark “supposedly bought for us,” she wrote, explaining that she was “taken aback” because she had “no idea he was even looking for real estate.”
“My first reaction was one of shock and confusion, as I thought it was a huge decision that we should have discussed together,” the OP wrote. And that was before she realized it “wasn’t just any house.”
Rather, the home he purchased “was a fixer-upper on the outskirts of town,” the OP said. “Now, I get that it can be a great investment, but this particular house needed a ton of work,” she wrote. “I’m talking major renovations and repairs, and I honestly had no desire to live there. Mark had not consulted me at all before making this purchase, and I felt blindsided.”
Under different circumstances, the OP “would be overjoyed about investing in our future together,” she said, “but the fact that he had made such a significant commitment without me crushed me.”
So, she “quietly” took the key and went outside to chat, telling Mark “how hurt I felt that he had made such a big decision without discussing it with me first and that it felt like a violation of trust.”
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Mark’s reaction? He “got defensive and insisted that this was a wonderful surprise—a way for us to start our lives together,” per the OP. “He said I was missing the bigger picture and that I should be excited about our future. Honestly, I just felt overwhelmed and confused. I told him I didn’t think we were ready for this and that we should focus on our wedding first.”
But, after a “heated argument,” she “made the gut-wrenching decision” to call off their nuptials, leaving Mark “devastated” and the couple’s friends in shock.
“I had just ruined what was supposed to be a happy night, and I felt horrible,” the OP wrote. “Since then, Mark has been trying to reach out, saying he wishes we could talk it over, but I can’t shake the feeling that he disrespected my feelings and my input in our relationship.”
Many users responding in the comments under the post came to the agreement that the OP was not in the wrong for calling off the wedding.
"NTA. Terrible judgment on Mark’s part but what I find the real problem here was his response when you pointed out the obvious. He argued with you. The lightbulb did not go on with him that you don’t make decisions like this without the other person," wrote one user.
Another agreed, adding, "As another comment said real life is not like a movie. In a marriage there shouldn't be anything that huge that is a surprise. You need to consult your spouse for something that affects your financial well-being. I agree at the end this may not be the last big surprise he gives."
Read the original article on People
