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Sex after children requires teamwork and caring

Yahoo! Shine Staff
Shine from Yahoo! Canada
August 1, 2011

Enjoying a healthy sex life after a baby is born is one of the most discussed topics related to pregnancy.

It's not a simple issue to deal with for some couples, but there are some tips and points of discussion that can help.

Typically, after a baby is born men are more interested in sex than women. Hormonal changes for women, plus physical issues like childbirth, nursing, stress and physical exhaustion may all lower a woman's sex drive.

While a woman may lose interest in her lover, the man may still be very much interested in lovemaking.

During this time, the man may feel distant and miss the intimacy, but more importantly he may feel his partner doesn't care enough to engage him.

It's critical for couples to realize they are different, but not to take these differences personally.

It may also take a new mother time to feel confident in her physical appearance following childbirth, according to website babycenter.ca.

It's important during this stage for couples to talk about their feelings to avoid one person from feeling rejected. Let your partner know the reasons you're holding back, especially if it's physical discomfort or anxiety.

A good idea is for couples to make time for each other, even if the day seems hectic and little time is available.

[See also: Understanding the three trimesters]

"Words and cuddles can do much to convey affection and emotion, and you will both benefit from this closeness," the the babycenter article notes.

And, it's important to remember sex doesn't mean there needs to be intercourse. It can be just as pleasurable simply to touch.

Getting used to being touched again after pregnancy may require time, so cuddling is a good place to start.

If being tired is the problem, try to make special time for each other during the baby's nap.

The time to become intimate again is when each parter agrees it's the right time.

Some couples resume sex earlier than others for a variety of reasons, including medical.

Remember, there is no 'norm' for when to resume intimacy again, so there's no need to feel anxiety or pressured.

But ensure the topic of resuming sex is a shared discussion.

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