"I Don't Think Younger People Realize This": 24 "Hard To Swallow" Truths About Aging That No One Talks About
Some may say that though aging is a privilege, it's not exactly the easiest thing to accept. When Redditor u/Fainne-Wu asked Reddit community members to share the hardest parts about aging, some of the responses were so incredibly relatable and vulnerable that those from the BuzzFeed Community wanted to share their thoughts, too. Here are some of the hardest truths about aging that you might have never thought about or realized:
1."I used to enjoy parties and talking to people, but now I forget names, cities I've visited, other peoples' children and grandchildren, and more. It is very awkward to talk to people now, so I don't talk a lot at parties anymore."
—Pradeep, 73, New York
2."I miss my parents organizing vacations. I love to travel with my husband, but most of the planning falls to me, which leaves me with low-level anxiety — did I spend too much? Is that company legit? What if we damage the rental car, etc.? My dad is such a good vacation planner, and I never had to worry about anything when abroad."
3."I miss living with my parents. I miss seeing my mom every day. I live across the world from her now, and although we call each other every day, it's just not the same."
4."Losing my voice. I used to have a nice singing voice. I sang harmony well and enjoyed singing along with the radio and alone. It brought me a lot of joy, but now, my voice sounds like I have a permanent cold. I also used to play the flute competently, but now I can no longer reach the high notes. It's hard to accept. I don't think younger people realize that the talents you had in your youth might not be there after the age of 70."
—Mimi, 72
5."My husband and I opted not to have children. I still don't regret the decision, but I do wonder what will happen to me when I'm older. I'm 65 now, but if I lose my husband, I will be alone, and that scares me."
6."Feeling that I no longer have anything of value to contribute. No one really cares about my life experiences. I'm yesterday's news."
—John, 81, California
7."For me, it's losing that feeling of innocence you had in your youth, like seeing your crush in class and imagining a relationship in your head. Swimming, eating junk food, and watching movies with good friends — just a family-sized bag of chips and a Dr. Pepper. It's hard to put into words, but I miss that feeling. When you get older, you lose the excitement of so many firsts: your first kiss, your first time sneaking out, your first time walking around a mall without parental guidance, first this, and first that. Life just felt so exhilarating. The feelings begin to fade out as you get older, and it's hard. Those times in the past were so happy."
8."As you get older, you make a lot more noise, even when you're just moving about as normal."
9."Seeing my parents get older."
10."Not being allowed to eat all the good things you enjoyed when you were younger: sweets, salty things, fries, bread, etc. When you're older, all those things either get you sick or sicker."
—Anonymous
11."Accepting it."
12."Deciding when to retire. Your mind is willing to stay motivated, but your body is failing. Also, trying to figure out things like Medicare and Social Security. There are so many discussions; the government couldn't make Medicare any more complicated if they tried."
—Anonymous
13."I could sound like a broken record that's been heard by all generations, but the truth is, as you get older, the healing process gets slower, and you end up in pain for longer periods of time. You'll hit a threshold where trying to work out the pain only makes it worse."
14."It becomes more difficult to make new friends, even as your closest ones move away, die, or just drift apart over time."
15."Reflecting on the past and wishing you could change certain aspects of your life. Sometimes, it's asking yourself, What if I had done one random thing differently? But then you understand that this is your life now, and there is no going back and no do-overs. The tough reality is that it's hard; you have goals and hopes you never quite achieved, and you constantly ask yourself why you didn't die sooner."
16."I regret not enjoying my childhood! I took a lot for granted as a kid. Man, that saying, 'Youth is wasted on the young,' couldn't be more true."
17."It is increasingly more difficult, expensive, and complicated to do something about a career rut and/or the need to break out and retrain for something else. That, and discovering real talents and passions for things that you realistically have no time or possibility to pursue because you wasted your younger years working jobs you hated to chase someone else's dream."
18."Feeling your body get worse while your mind doesn't seem to age."
19."I heard someone talking about 'not knowing when the good ole days were,' and it's true. You don't know those days are over until they're behind you, and sometimes, if you're lucky, you can have multiple times in your life that are like that. I hope that rings true for the rest of you."
20."Getting both more responsibility and freedom. Like, you could do anything, but that could also mess you up — and there's no one to stop you from doing that."
21."The complete inability to sleep in. The older you get, the earlier your body wakes you up. You don't necessarily need to be up for anything on Saturday or Sunday morning, but your body has decided to go to work on your off days. When you're a teenager or in college, sleeping 12–14 hours is considered completely normal and acceptable when there's nothing to do. I would pay $100 a night if I could get 12 hours of uninterrupted sleep and actually feel well-rested when I wake."
22."Time is perceived faster for some reason. Everything speeds up, and you're still trying to catch up. In some ways, it's good, like making the work day go by quicker. In others, it's bad, like having less time for friends and the hobbies you used to be able to devote many more hours to."
23."With each passing day, my chance to see the world passes. I don't have the money to travel as much as I want, and I know I will die missing out on so much. It's a sad reality for everyone, but it's still hard to handle."
24.Last but not least: "Seeing people you love make the same mistakes as you did."
If you're an older adult, what do you think is a difficult aspect of aging that no one really talks about? If you want a chance to be featured in an upcoming BuzzFeed Community post, let us know your experience in the comments! Or, if you want to submit it anonymously, you can do so using this form.
Note: Some submissions have been edited for length and/or clarity.
