How to Travel With Kids, According to Globetrotting Parents

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I just got back from a three-month, six-continent, round-the-world solo trip with my 2.5-year-old son Julian. When I tell strangers this, they typically have one of two reactions: “Wow, you’re brave!” is the nicer one. A variation of “Are you nuts?” is the other.

To both of these, I reply: “Yes, and thank you—but I didn’t do it alone.” Throughout our 88-day trip, which I am documenting for Condé Nast Traveler via an exclusive newsletter about family travel (sign up here), I tapped into a broad network of jet-setting parents, needling them for their best advice on navigating the very real physical, social, and emotional torments of traveling with children.

It was these pearls of wisdom—plus daily FaceTime calls with my ever-patient husband, WhatsApp chats with friends, and connections I made with like-minded parents through Facebook groups such as Families Who Love to Travel and Tiny Globetrotters—that kept me afloat during the more challenging moments abroad. I’ve put their words into action countless times and am thrilled to pay it forward by sharing their sage guidance with you.

Ahead, more than a dozen travel journalists, tour operators, and other road warriors share their best advice for traveling with babies, teens, and everyone in between.

Travel early, and travel often

David DiGregorio, the New York-based managing director of consulting firm CornerSun Destination Marketing, and his wife traveled frequently before having children. But when Chandra got pregnant with their first daughter, people loved to chirp, “Guess your traveling days are over!” The couple found this response obnoxious and decided that, no, actually, their daughter Samara would have to “adjust to our lifestyle just as much as we would have to adjust to hers.”

From the get-go, Samara was out and about with the DiGregorios, crossing Canada by train when she was just 10 weeks old. “It got her used to moving around and being out of a routine very early in life,” says DiGregorio. “By the time she was a year old, she was extremely adaptable and could easily be put into new situations without complaining […] It was the perfect training for the little traveler she became.”

Fast-forward to today and Samara, now 11, has been to dozens of countries. DiGregorio credits an early start with teaching his daughter how to be less nonjudgmental and more flexible. “Samara understands fundamentally what so many Americans don’t when traveling abroad—that she is the foreigner and must adjust, not the other way around,” he says. It’s also been a huge confidence booster. “Samara is happy to order her own food at a restaurant or go into a store on her own to buy something using money she’s never seen before. Put her on a playground anywhere in the world and she’ll come back with friends even if she doesn’t speak the language.”

Pack light and buy the basics abroad

When Kathryn Romeyn, a Bali-based travel journalist and podcaster, and her husband brought their 10-week-old daughter, Indah, to Palm Springs, they packed “the entire house.” Though she felt silly showing up for a three-night stay in an SUV overflowing with baby gear, being overly prepared for that first trip gave her the confidence to winnow down her packing list on future trips. Indah, who is now 3.5 years old, has visited 18 countries; her 11-month-old sister, Mira, has already been to seven. “I’m happy to report that we pack even less for two kids on trips now than we did with just one infant,” says Romeyn, who has learned to make toys out of everything from an empty plastic water bottle to the flap on an airline seat headrest. Her only musts these days are Cerebelly pouches for the baby (“more than I think she could possibly eat”), teething crackers, and diapers, the bulk of which can be purchased at your destination.

While DiGregorio used to bring a standard-issue stroller on trips, he now swears by the micro stroller from Pockit Air, which pops open in “two seconds” and fits kids from 6 months to 5 years of age (up to 55 pounds). Other parents I spoke with shouted out “game-changing” inflatable booster seats and bed bumpers, which are compact enough to fit a carry-on, and toddler-sized hiking packs for more outdoorsy pursuits.

Cinzia Reale-Castello, a Rutherford, NJ-based photo editor and mother of 4-year-old Leonora, also suggests hiding a “dupe stuffie” in your bag in case your kiddo loses their most treasured friend abroad, as happened with her daughter’s beloved Black Cat. (Not to fear—she was reunited with the original in Rome.)

Involve the kids in research and planning

It’s easy for forever-rushing parents to just “drag your kids around without looping them in on what’s actually happening,” says Romeyn. But the more children know, she finds, the better they behave. “Talk to your kids about the travel that’s coming up, even if you think they’re too young to understand,” she advises. “Tell them what it’ll feel like to be in an airplane, what sounds they’ll hear, what they’ll see, and what you’ll do—like, ‘we’re going to be in the plane for two sleeps but we’ll play in between and eat three meals.’”

Marilyn Lobos, a Lyndhurst, NJ-based art teacher, encourages her 8-year-old daughter Luna to look at maps with her, help make lists of things to do in case it rains, and always ask themselves, “‘What can we do, see, eat, and experience here that we can’t do at home or anywhere else?’”

Involving kids in the planning process is especially important with teens and tweens, says Chris Bergaust, a Washington, D.C.-based Foreign Service Officer who has four exceptionally well-traveled children: 19-year-old Erik, 17-year-old Joseph, 15-year-old Adam, and 12-year-old Ana. “Your teenagers will appreciate having a voice,” he says, “and they’ll stay more engaged and be less likely to grumble if they previously committed to an activity.”

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The idea of showing your kids the world is a powerful one—but the realities of parenting, particularly for women, far from vanish once you hit the road.

Consider the combo trip

Tom Marchant, the London-based co-founder of luxury travel agency Black Tomato, recently took his two daughters, 6-year-old Minnie and 3.5-year-old Coco, on their first multi-destination trip. While Iceland and Morocco might sound like an odd coupling, Marchant found the combination both thrilling and rewarding—a way to show his daughters “two very different cultures, lifeways, environments, and topographies on one trip while having the right balance of adventure and chill time.”

Game the seating system

When traveling with two parents and two kids, Romeyn has had some success securing seats in different rows. “It might sound weird but it was far easier for [my husband] to handle Indah and me to handle baby Mira and not to have them getting in each other’s way or waking each other up,” she says. DiGregorio takes a different approach for his family of four by booking both aisle and window seats in the same row and leaving the two middles empty. “Sometimes people show up for the middle seats and we scoot over and give them the aisle,” he says. “But sometimes we get six seats for the four of us.”

Make peace with screens

Many parents told me they limit screen time at home but always pack an iPad loaded with educational games and children’s shows when traveling. “Peppa Pig was our secret weapon,” says Chris Schalkx, a Bangkok-based writer and photographer, when he needed to keep his now 6-year-old son, Ollie, quiet on public transport or in a fancy restaurant. Just be sure to download videos for offline viewing in advance of a trip, adds Bergaust, since WiFi can be scarce, connections often go down, and built-in screens don’t exist on certain model planes. He also advises switching off electronics 10 minutes before arriving at your destination, noting that doing so “gives kids a chance to reset and be less grumpy.”

Spring for the VIP treatment

Some airport terminals have indoor playgrounds, others designated security lines and check-in counters for families. “They aren’t clearly advertised, so you should always ask,” says DiGregorio. “They can save a ton of time and headaches.” He also recommends booking day rooms in an airport hotel or lounge for longer layovers (“it gives us a private place to sleep and use a home base”) and pre-arranging a VIP meet-and-assist service directly through the airport or local tour operator when available. “Someone will be waiting for you as you walk off the aircraft to escort you through immigration and other formalities,” he says. “This removes the pain of figuring out where to go and what to do, and waiting in any lines.”

Always have food on hand

Snacks on the plane are a given, but feeding the beasts that are our offspring is a 24-7 job. “Kids wake up and expect breakfast, so be prepared,” says Campbell Levy, the Evergreen, CO-based founder and CEO of PR and marketing firm CampStories, and dad of three young boys: Wilder (6), Lawless (4), and Hawkins (2). “Many hotels have larger refrigerators available to roll into your room—call ahead and request it,” he advises, noting that you can also ask for it to be stocked with simple ingredients like milk. “This is assuming you cannot get a room with a kitchenette,” he says. “If you can, you obviously want it.”

Build in a cushion day to decompress

“As much as [travel] can be a slog for adults, time zone shifts can prove especially disorienting for the youngest,” says Marchant. His best strategy for coping with jet lag is to build in an extra day or two to acclimate to a new time zone. If you have only a few days to spare, stick closer to home. DiGregorio concurs, noting how his family traveled mostly to South America when their elder daughter was very small because the time zones were similar to New York, making it easier to maintain her sleep schedule.

Don’t plan long car rides for late in the day

When Saralyn Bellmer, the Asheville, NC-based founder of Heilbron Herbs, drove from San Jose, Costa Rica, to the Caribbean Coast with her daughter Ursa, now 2, they ran errands in the morning and didn’t hit the highway until mid-afternoon. Big mistake. “We deeply regretted not getting on the road first thing when [then-5-month-old] Ursa proceeded to scream for the majority of the four-hour trip,” she recalls. By delaying, “everyone’s already tired and if the kid has a meltdown, there’s no room for taking a break.” The family arrived after dark, “beyond exhausted and all on edge.”

Build in playtime

“It can be hard to remember that it’s not all about you—especially if you’ve done a ton of solo travel before becoming a parent,” says Terry Ward, a Tampa-based freelance writer who has taken her two kids, 8-year-old Nico and 7-year-old Gabi, to 18 countries. “I’ve selfishly found myself trying to make sure they don’t catch a glimpse of a playground as we pass by, but kids need the familiarity of places like that on the road as much as at home.” Finding opportunities for your kids to socialize with other children—whether it’s at a local playground or a resort pool—is also important.

Traveling with friends who have children the same age or older can help. Reale-Castello and her husband Jeff Quinn, a graphic designer, felt lucky to find themselves in Puerto Rico at the same time as friends with 9- and 12-year-old children. “They loved hanging out with our toddler and I trusted them to watch her by the pool or on the beach,” says Reale-Castello. “It was also way more fun for her having other kids around, even with the age gap.”

Sleuth out science museums

“They’re interactive, good for a wide range of ages, and have the added bonus of teaching things,” says Bergaust, whose favorites include Parque de las Ciencias in Granada, Spain; the Franklin Institute in Philadelphia; California Science Center in Los Angeles; and Discovery Center of Idaho in Boise.

Play Let’s Make a Deal

“When our kids were younger, and even now, we compromise,” says Robin Kapiloff, a Boston-based supply chain program manager and mother of 18-year-old Maggie and 14-year-old Gabe. “If you take this tour of Comuna 13 [in Medellín, Colombia], you can spend the afternoon in the pool and on Wifi.”

Carve out one-on-one time

Arye Dworken, a Teaneck, NJ-based creative director, and his wife Shana are big beach people. But getting his three kids—14-year-old Steven, 11-year-old Eleanor, and 9-year-old Edie—on the same page about activities or outings can be a challenge. Devising ways to spend one-on-one time with each child over the course of a vacation is key, he says. “If Edie is bored on the beach, I’d take her to get lemonade. Or if the girls want to stay in the hotel and watch TV, I’ll take Steven to the pool. Group dynamics are a lot, so I'm okay with breaking off to [make] one kid the focus of my attention.”

Book a one-on-one trip

Before going to Islamabad, Pakistan for an unaccompanied work assignment, Bergaust took each of his four children on individual trips. This included a multi-day backpacking excursion in Idaho with his eldest son, Universal Studios in Singapore with his second-born, temple hopping and cave tubing with his youngest boy in Yogyakarta, Indonesia, and lazing on the beach at the Ritz-Carlton in Bali with his only daughter. “These were some of our most cherished travel experiences and something we fondly recall years later,” he says.

Hire that babysitter

Parents need one-on-one time too. The DiGregorios, whose children are now 11 and 4 years old, recently started using babysitters when traveling to give themselves a date night or two during a trip. They’ve had luck relying on hotel recommendations, tapping professional contacts, and asking friends of friends who live in the destination. “Typically, the babysitter will come over once our younger daughter is asleep and just hang out in the hotel room until we're back,” he says. “This gives us a chance to actually experience some nightlife, and maybe a restaurant that we wouldn't normally bring the kids to,” he says.

Just chill

The 28- and 30-year-old daughters of Lisa Alam Shah, the Delhi-based executive director of luxury tour operator Micato India, are all grown up now, but Shah acutely remembers the myriad triumphs and struggles of traveling with young children. “On vacation, things go wrong, new places feel scary—it happens,” says Shah. “So, calm down because your young child will mirror your bad energy and will continue to do so as an adult. If you can’t stay calm, at least act calm.”

Rachel Lees, a Sydney-based freelance writer and editor, and mother of 5-year-old Lachie, suggests downloading a meditation app on your phone and using it when you’re feeling overwhelmed. Calm has 3-, 6-, and 10-minute “emergency calm” meditations, which she used regularly when her son was a toddler.

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It was as wild as you’d imagine. But was it worth it?

Manage expectations and always be willing to flex

“Planning point-to-point or A, B, C, works great when it works,” says Levy. But with kids, you have to be willing to abandon ship and “embrace serendipity.” Bergaust echoes this. “Don’t overschedule your trips,” he warns. While it’s nice to have a rough idea of what you want to do in a place—and buy tickets in advance for busy attractions—mapping out every minute seldom works in your favor. “Part of the joy in traveling is having spontaneous moments,” says Bergaust. “[When] everyone is focused on getting to the next thing, you miss being fully present.”

Give the kids a chance to flex too

From years of nannying, Bellmer knows that some kids crave structure and routine more than others, and those needs can change with age. “There are some days where getting takeout and eating in our rental is just more enjoyable than weathering a tantrum at a restaurant,” says Bellmer. “But we’ve also discovered that our kid is more flexible than we realize.” One scheduled nap might turn into a shorter snooze in a hiking backpack or car seat, for example. “We’ve learned to ride that edge,” says Bellmer. “Sometimes it backfires but more often than not it feels like we’re cultivating a healthy sense of adaptability”—for parents and child alike.

Engage with humans to raise engaged humans

Hitting all the marquee museums and snapping photos in front of iconic monuments is great and all, says Shah, but you lose something in the process: the people that make a place come alive. “Make the time and space for your children to meet the locals,” says Shah. “Talk to your drivers and encourage your children to do the same. Talk to the guides, the shopkeepers, and the local families you see on the street who have kids the same age as your own; take 15 minutes to let your children talk to their children. That’s what they’ll remember.”

Romeyn also suggests teaching kids a few phrases in the native tongue of the country where they’re traveling. “A little kid speaking—or attempting to speak—the language absolutely charms and surprises people everywhere you go,” she says. “It’s such fun to see their reactions when they hear what’s come out of your kid’s mouth.”

Don’t let fear stand in the way of seeing the world

“Kids can be jerks,” says Levy. “I know some parents that choose to not travel with their young kids because it’s hard. But honestly, kids are going to be jerks at home, just like they’re going to be jerks while you’re traveling. Might as well be traveling.”

Originally Appeared on Condé Nast Traveler

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