25 Tweets About What It's Like To Hide From Your Kids
When you’re a parent, meeting your own basic needs — to eat, drink water, sleep, shower or use the toilet — can take some serious strategizing. This is why parents act like it’s the end of the world when their kid doesn’t nap: It evaporates their hope for that day’s tiny scrap of self-care.
Now if you decide to get greedy and ask for, say, an entire minute of quiet in order to sort your scrambled thoughts or to bleed a few brain cells by scrolling social media and your children aren’t sleeping, then you’ll have to get creative in a way generations of parents have done.
Think of it as a game of hide-and-go-seek that your kids don’t know they’re playing. And enjoy every blissful second of solitude, because you know they’ll find you before long.
Here, some of the funniest parents on X (formerly Twitter) describe what it’s like to hide from your children — and why it was the best part of the day.
Sorry, can't. I'm hiding from my kids.
— 3 Wild Rainbows (@wildrainbow2) February 17, 2022
It’s not ‘hiding from your kids in a closet’, it’s creating bonding time for your spouse and child
— Real Life Mommy (@reallifemommy3) January 14, 2022
Maybe the original Santa was just a dad who put on a disguise to hide from his family.
— Daddy Go Fish (@daddygofish) December 22, 2023
Not me hiding from my child’s preschool out for a walk
— Lizzie O'Leary (@lizzieohreally) March 4, 2024
I appreciate the lawn mowing and the snow shoveling but babe, leaf-blowing is just hiding from your kids
— Schmaaaags (@schmaaaags) December 2, 2024
I'm the hottest mom hiding from her family in this pantry right now.
— Laura Marie (@lmegordon) December 27, 2021
you see how we hide from our kids to share a pint of ice cream? very demure, very mindful
— Joe (@joenahnah) September 1, 2024
I grabbed some snacks and went to hide from my kids so I could eat them alone. My dog saw me and I thought he was gonna follow me, but he just looked at me with pity. I've never felt more embarrassed.
— Marcy G (@BunAndLeggings) July 26, 2022
Me at 15: Making out in the closet to hide from my parents
Me at 40: Making out in the closet to hide from my kids— The Dad (@thedad) March 12, 2023
The wifi not reaching to the bathroom is just cruel when it’s the only place I have to hide from my kid
— Lottie-pop 🍭 (@Lottie_Poppie) February 2, 2023
Parenting involves a lot more hiding from my kids in pantries, closets and bathrooms than I ever would have thought.
— Dadof2Boys (@Dadof2crazyboys) September 19, 2023
5yo: Can I have my own hiding spot?
Me: What are you hiding from?
5yo: Dad’s smelly farts.
Me:
Me: Can I hide with you?— Jennifer Parker (@Mrs_JParker) July 13, 2024
Dead ass hiding from my 21 mo rn bc he is so ragey post-nap but only if he can see me??????
— emily may (@emilykmay) January 9, 2023
My 8yo girl picked up this thing from my wife where she goes into my bathroom multiple times a day, locks the door, and pretend plays putting on make-up.
Where the heck am I going to go to hide from my family now?— My Life As Dad (@milifeasdad) September 25, 2023
Always so torn between hiding from my family so I can have some alone time and then hearing them having fun and getting instant family time FOMO
— amil (@amil) April 22, 2021
I'm playing hide and seek with my 6yo. I'm underneath a pile of laundry, and she just walked right by me. This is exhilarating. It feels like that scene in Jurassic Park when the kids are hiding from the raptors.
— Marcy G (@BunAndLeggings) April 21, 2024
not me, hiding in the shower to get a few extra minutes away from having to be a person that everyone needs 🤫
— ᔕᴀᴍᴀɴᴛʜᴀ ᗰᴀʀɪᴊᴜᴀɴᴀ (@Sammi_Sativa) February 10, 2024
True love is when you hide from kids in the bathroom so you both can eat cookies in peace.
— Dadof2Boys (@Dadof2crazyboys) May 14, 2024
I just found my husband hiding from our family on the floor of the closet, so I asked him to scoot over and make room for me.
— Laura Marie (@lmegordon) January 18, 2020
Game of Thrones, except it’s me hiding from my kids in different bathrooms.
— @itssherifield (@itssherifield) November 19, 2021
73% of parenting is hiding from your kids in the pantry so you don’t have to share snacks.
— Dadof2Boys (@Dadof2crazyboys) August 25, 2023
Sometimes self care looks like hiding from your family in your car while eating tacos.
— The Salty Mamas (@saltymamas) October 20, 2021
If I ever need to hide from my kids I just sit next to the clothes hamper.
— Larry’s Twin 99 (@LarrysTwin99) October 4, 2024
Still on holiday but reached the stage of being away where I’m actively hiding from the kids who are completely feral right now. The one year old just launched herself into the bathtub after destroying the bathroom and fishing in the toilet for the toddlers poo
— amil (@amil) July 13, 2021
If you’re looking for me, don’t
— I Hide From My Kids (@IHideFromMyKids) August 10, 2024
