Bridesmaid Doesn't Find Out About $5K Cost of Bachelorette Trip Until She's Already There

A friend explained in a post on Reddit that the bridesmaid was already "panicking about money" when she heard how much she would have to contribute to the trip

A bridesmaid was shocked to learn that her share of a friend's bachelorette getaway would cost her $5,000 — after she was already on the trip.

A friend of the bridesmaid detailed the dilemma in a recent post on Reddit, writing that the bridesmaid recently attended a bride-to-be's bachelorette celebration — a four-day weekend in New Orleans — along with nine other bridesmaids. With each bridesmaid contributing $5,000, the total cost of the trip was $50,000.

"She (understandably) was panicking about money because the entire weekend ended up costing each bridesmaid $5,000," the friend said, before revealing, "She didn’t learn how much it would cost until she was already there."

Related: Alex Cooper Slams Extravagant Bachelorette Parties: ‘Knock It Off’

The friend went on to clarify that the $5,000 only covered the bachelorette trip itself, not the additional costs of serving as a bridesmaid, such as travel and a hotel for the wedding weekend, a dress and a gift for the newlyweds.

"Where do people get off asking their friends to spend such an insane amount of money?! I can’t even begin to understand!" the friend concluded the Reddit post.

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The post sparked a lively discussion in the comments section, with many agreeing that $5,000 is a lot of money to spend on attending someone's bachelorette party.

"I'll never understand brides who refuse to be cognizant of their bridal party's financial limits. Or, if they are and want an expensive bachelorette weekend, they should pay for most, if not all of it!" one person wrote.

Another commented: "If I found out just the bachelorette party was going to cost me $5K, I’d nope out of being a bridesmaid in that wedding SO HARD."

A third person chimed in, "I barely spent $5,000 on my wedding — I cannot imagine asking someone, let alone multiple people, to spend $5k. It’s beyond."

Still, other people argued that it was down to the bridesmaid to do her due diligence and find out the cost of the trip before agreeing to go.

"I am sorry, but when there is a trip plan, you need to be fully aware of the cost of accommodation. And how you arrive whether that be flight or driving," someone wrote. "You need to ask the questions. Those are the two biggest expenses."

Related: Woman Agrees to Be a Bridesmaid for Best Friend — Then Finds Out It's $8K Per-Person Destination Wedding

The friend addressed this point in a reply in the comments, writing: "She knew of the cost for lodging and flights and one of the planned activities, but she didn’t realize they hired a private chef for every day and scheduled other activities that ended up being charged later in the trip. I also don’t think she anticipated being asked to cover 1/10th of everything for the bride, including first-class flight costs."

A number of commenters suggested that people need to feel comfortable declining a bachelorette trip invitation if the cost is too much for them.

"People say yes to these things and grumble about it afterwards. I don't understand. An invitation is not a summons," one Redditor wrote. "If you can afford it and want to go then go. You will probably have a lot of fun. If you can't afford it, then don't go."

Another person commented: "An invitation is not a demand, it’s a request — one you can turn down."

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