The Baby Shower Alternative That's Taking Over the Parenting Space
If there is one universal truth I’ve learned since becoming a parent, it's that you don’t need much in motherhood — but you do need a supportive village to rally behind you. My first pregnancy and postpartum experience were challenging, as I struggled with anxiety and the significant identity change that comes with birthing and raising a human. To cope and adapt, I pushed myself out of my comfort zone to invest in new friendships and find like-minded women who were also raising babies at the same time as me.
So, when I was expecting my second baby, and my friends asked if they could do something to help me, I knew exactly what I wanted: a nesting party, or a mama shower, as we called it. Considering I already had a daughter and was welcoming another, plus I’m a journalist privileged to receive many media samples of products, I didn’t need anything for this new addition to our family. But I did need an afternoon celebrating another chapter in motherhood and doing practical tasks to help navigate those first few chaotic weeks.
I wasn’t the only mom-to-be who decided to opt out of the traditional baby shower in lieu of a more personal, thoughtful and purposeful gathering of friends and loved ones. According to Pinterest’s 2025 Predictions report, searches for “nesting party” are up 205% and “nesting party ideas” are up 105%. Gina Jokilehto, owner and creative director of Shi Shi Events, echoes this shift in showers, crediting their uptick in popularity due to the need to build and foster a community for new parents.
“New parents need a village, and a nesting shower is a way to feel supported by that village before the baby even arrives,” she shares. “The parties also allow for members of your village with specific strengths to shine: Your friend, an organizational wizard, can tackle closets, dressers and diaper caddies. Another friend or family member might be really handy with tools and can help assemble the stroller, crib and other baby gear.”
This rang true for my mama shower, where three of my closest friends teamed together to create a sweet experience focused on stocking our freezer and blessing my belly. Since we already had all of our gear built and a nursery set up from our first daughter, my shower focused on cooking a bunch of meals and snacks for my husband and me to heat up quickly, removing the stress of meal planning with a newborn and toddler.
One of my friends volunteered as Head Chef, and came up with a game plan for recipes and sourced monetary donations from friends far and wide to contribute to the cost of groceries. This not only allowed friends who couldn’t attend in person to be part of my shower but meant more meals for us, with additional funds. During the shower, the Head Chef printed out recipes and instructions and groups of friends signed up for what they wanted to do: chop up ingredients, cook, package and label, and so on.
While some groups were working magic in the kitchen, other groups kept me company by painting my belly and writing birth affirmations for my upcoming delivery. The Master Organizer friend secured the paints, gave instructions for the affirmations and generally kept the afternoon running calmly and smoothly.
Another benefit of having this type of gathering was the opportunity to give those friends who are child-free by choice or who have yet to have children of their own a way to feel included. Sometimes, baby showers can overly index on the cutesy baby stuff, leaving some friends and family members uncomfortable. What they can relate to — and frankly, what women need more — is supporting someone they love through a significant life transition. Considering the new baby will have the undivided attention of two parents, spotlighting the pregnant woman for a day seems like the least we can do.
If your mother or mother-in-law insists on having a traditional baby shower, let them throw one in your honor and handle all the details. But if you want a cozy, intimate day with your closest girlfriends and family, consider asking one of them to throw you a mama shower or nesting party — particularly if it’s your second pregnancy. I thought of my mama shower as an alternative to a "baby sprinkle" and specifically asked for no gifts. The gift, to me, was feeling my village lift up our family during this time.
There are only so many ways a mother can stretch herself, and when welcoming another child, a nesting shower provides those extra hands to accomplish the organization and preparation needed to welcome a new baby household, Jokilehto says. “While first-time mothers may have a lot of gifts to put away and rooms to prep and organize, second-time mothers may have a lot of culling, repurposing and making room for another baby to join the family,” she shares. “Nesting showers offer support for the family as a whole, whether it’s baby number one, two, or even three.”
My mama shower was held right around my 38th week of pregnancy — and the timing felt perfect. This meant the freezer food would spend, well, less time in our freezer, thus feeling flavorful and fresh when we reheated it, and also, it matched my energy. Jokilehto says this is another reason why nesting parties are becoming more mainstream and preferred by women: They lean into the natural urge many expectant mothers feel in their third trimester. “By having a nesting party, the mama-to-be gets her house fully prepped and ready without feeling like all of the tasks fall on her to accomplish,” she shares. “It’s an uplifting, celebratory way for her to prepare, clean, and organize the home for the baby’s arrival.”
My second daughter was born 12 days after my mama shower, with all of the affirmations from my friends taped to the wall for me to see and read. When we came home and started navigating our new normal as parents of two, we savored having shepherd's pie and Italian meatball soup already prepared and ready for us to throw together for a quick dinner. Breakfast burritos also came in extremely handy, when, ahem, you often only have one hand to use as a mom. (And sometimes, not even one when you're wrangling a toddler, too!)
What I'll cherish (and remember) the most from my nesting party is looking around my living room, admiring the women who have helped me grow into motherhood, given me grace during the changes, and been there to celebrate and honor my journey — the good, the hard, the bad, the beautiful and the messy. After all, motherhood is all of those things and more, and not only am I the luckiest to have our village — but my daughters are, too.
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