"I Encourage Everyone To Stop Immediately": People Are Sharing The Social Norms We All Follow That Need To Disappear Yesterday, And They Make Some VERY Good Points
Let's face it: there are a ton of "unwritten" rules we all follow in society, and while some are beneficial, others are not so much. Recently, redditor Nebulaud asked the r/AskReddit community to share the social norms they believe "deserve to die." Here are a few they think should disappear for good.
1."Being expected to be 'available' at all times. Work chasing you home, work messages at all hours of the day and night, messages on vacation, sick days, etc."
"My phone is now almost permanently on 'Do Not Disturb,' and it has made a huge difference to my sanity."
2."Sharing everything in your life online for strangers to look at."
"I am such a private person. I never understand how people so freely expose themselves on social media for just about anyone to take a peek; it's truly wild to me."
3."Tablets for little kids. We need to keep screen time to a minimum for all the little beans. It is disrupting their brain."
"I started working in a pretty nice restaurant a few months ago, and this is shocking to me. Mostly, in any family out to dinner with a young child, the kid doesn't look away from the tablet for the entire time they're at the restaurant. Not when I'm taking orders or when I'm bringing food out. I'm glad that wasn't a thing when I was growing up."
4."Working beyond your assigned work hours. If I arrive on time, I should be able to leave on time. Of course, a bit of stretch every once in a while is okay, but this hustle culture of working 18 hours a day and wearing pride in your eyes needs to be challenged and eradicated for good."
"Especially at a workplace where it is completely obvious that promotions and raises don't really happen. Why are you killing yourself when there is zero benefit for you? The old days when it was possible to start working in the mailroom and end up as the president are LONG gone."
5."Demanding new hires have experience for entry-level jobs that would give them said experience. Obviously, plenty of jobs must require prior experience, but many of the ones that do really don't."
6."Not talking about your pay to coworkers."
"This only became a thing because companies didn't like their employees finding out that one of them was getting screwed. This absolutely needs to die."
7."Not accepting aging. 20-year-old girls shouldn't be getting 'preventative Botox,' and actresses showing signs of aging shouldn't lose jobs. 'Aging like milk' shouldn't be a saying at all. Normalize aging in general."
8."Long goodbyes. When I say it's time to go, I am ready TO LEAVE. The Midwestern politeness thing where you say goodbye five times, and it takes an hour, needs to GTFO."
"The hour-long goodbyes at family parties growing up have made me a fierce advocate of the Irish goodbye in adulthood."
9."Tipping on self-checkout/retail/fast food just because the iPad told you to. Also, not putting a custom tip when the options are 30%, 40%, and 50% of the post-tax total."
"I am not opposed to tipping for table service or something like a massage or pedicure or whatever, but I will never understand why I need to tip at Subway, Starbucks, etc. Just pay your workers a decent wage!"
10."'Respect your elders.' An older asshole is still an asshole."
"Being older does not give you a free pass to be rude."
11."Overconsumption. I think mindful consumption is so important. Yes, you can spend money on things, but I think they should be things you really value. It clutters up your mind space, your home, and the environment. There are so many ways to get your dopamine rush. You can even buy really quality clothes second-hand on Poshmark and The RealReal, and they can be priced at Shein and Aliexpress prices but way better quality."
12."Telling people you're doing okay when they ask how you're doing when you're not doing okay. Fuck that."
13."Asking women when/if they're going to have children or if they want children. It's such a personal question that I'm surprised people still ask."
"I lost the ability to have kids years ago, and I still get asked this question. I'm only 26, and I never wanted kids anyway, but I just say, 'I can't conceive,' and people back off a bit."
14."Toxic positivity. I struggle to find spaces where I can let my problems out so I can get help."
15."Forcing kids to hug or show affection to relatives they're uncomfortable with. Teaching boundaries and consent from a young age is way more important than avoiding a moment of awkwardness at family gatherings."
16."The one that triggers me the most is that you have to be extremely polite when talking about money. Like, you get asked, 'How much do you want to earn from this job?' and you can't just say a number; you have to write a whole essay at the end of which you will be able to actually answer the question. And if you don't do it, everyone thinks you are not polite."
"As a hiring manager back in the days before HR took over, I was always happy when a candidate had done some homework and had some specific amounts in mind. It saved everybody time and annoyance. I had a budget, and they had a budget."
17."Weddings. Wedding culture under late-stage capitalism is wild. Let’s normalize not asking your friends and family to shell out thousands of dollars or go into debt out of obligation. What happened to going to a local bar for a bachelorette party? Why are we planning five-day trips to Miami?"
18."People are paying it forward in drive-thrus. You order a soda and end up paying $50 for someone else."
19."Saying 'bless you' after someone sneezes. I haven't said it in probably 20 years, and I encourage everyone to stop immediately. Let's make this happen."
What social norm do you hope will fall out of existence? Tell us in the comments or fill out this anonymous form.
Note: Some responses have been edited for length and/or clarity.
