Woman Ends Marriage After Her Husband Said He'd 'Resent' Her for Not Agreeing to an Open Marriage
A woman on Reddit is seeking advice after ending her marriage when her husband requested they open it
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A stock photo of a man and a woman arguing on a couchA woman decided she and her husband weren’t on the same page anymore when he asked for an open marriage — but she’s seeking advice after receiving criticism from her friends and family.
As detailed on Reddit, a woman says her husband asked her just four years into their marriage for an open relationship. Prior to his inquiry, they’d never discussed the possibility of opening their relationship to others.
“He said he loved me deeply but felt we could spice things up by exploring connections with other people,” the woman writes. “We had not even stayed together that long that we needed that. He claimed it wasn’t about lacking anything in our relationship but about growth and exploration.”
The Redditor says she was “shocked” at the request as she’d “always been monogamous.” Plus, “When we got married, we promised to be committed to each other,” she writes.
She says that despite telling her husband she “wasn’t comfortable with the idea,” as it felt like a “betrayal” of their vows, he continued to broach the subject with her. According to the poster, he insisted it could “strengthen [the] relationship,” though she maintained her stance.
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“Eventually, he said he would respect my boundaries but admitted he might end up resenting me later for holding him back,” she continues, noting this was the straw that broke the camel’s back. “That statement crushed me. It became clear that we were no longer on the same page about something fundamental.”
“I didn’t want to stay in a marriage where I’d always feel like I wasn’t enough or worry about future resentment. So, I decided to end it," she continues.
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A stock image of a man and a woman in an argumentSince deciding to end their marriage, she says her now-ex has been telling friends and family she “gave up on us too quickly” — and some of them seem to agree with him.
Though the people in the woman's life weren’t particularly supportive of her decision to leave him, strangers on Reddit were more than willing to agree with her decision to walk away.
“Anyone telling you to open the marriage to give it a shot isn't a mutual [friend], they're HIS friend,” one commenter wrote. “No one who is actually your friend would tell a monogamous person that they need to stay married to someone who wants to bang other people.”
Some commenters suggested the woman try counseling with him, though in comments she noted that he “refused” that option, which was part of why she ultimately ended the marriage.
“Sorry, you are not the one ‘giving up on the marriage,’ “ another commenter chimed in. “He is the one who does not take his vows seriously.”
